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Disclaimer and credits will be found after the end of the 
chapter.




          DRUNKARD'S WALK V / OH! MY BROTHER! BOOK II:
            ANOTHER DIVINE MESS YOU'VE GOTTEN ME INTO

           by Robert M. Schroeck and Christopher Angel



                   Dedicated to the memory of
                     our comrade and friend,
                    Lisa Frankel Tomaszewski 
                           (1965-2004)
                      Sorciere - Phantasia
                    The First Warrior To Fall




0.  Here Be Dragons

Zoom in on a city.

It's a seaside city, on the outer edge of a longish island off 
the coast of a large continent at the western edge of a large 
ocean.  It sprawls across a flattish plain near an almost 
perfectly conical volcanic peak crested with snow.

The city is Tokyo.

The time is the late 20th century.

The world, as is usually the case, is Earth.  

One of them, at least.

Zoom closer.

It's a modern city typical of its time period, with tall glass 
buildings and highways and many, many cars.  Surging tides of 
people flow through its streets, channeled and guided by 
sidewalks and traffic lights.  Even at this altitude they can be 
seen, although not individually.

Zoom even closer, and pan.

The city is made up of neighborhoods, each with its own style and 
personality.  Here is the downtown area, home to those tall 
buildings and surging tides of humanity.  It's the financial 
heart of the city, pulsing with the traffic of billions of yen 
every minute.  Over there, spread out around the bases of several 
immense tanks storing natural gas, is a quiet suburban district 
filled with shops and restaurants and homes.  Well beyond that is 
a zone of palaces and government buildings.

And over here is one of several college neighborhoods.  More 
apartments than single family homes are found here, surrounding 
the campus of a mid-sized institution of higher learning.  It's 
not Toudai, not nearly as prestigious.  But it's a tough school, 
and it turns out some of the best engineers on the island.  Maybe 
in the Pacific basin.

Let's get a little closer to this neighborhood.

As in many other parts of the city, the plain on which it is 
built is far from perfectly flat.  Small hills and shallow dales 
undulate across the plain here, and the homes and the businesses 
and the college are draped, sprawled or perched upon them.

Closer.

Not far from the college is a tallish hill, one of the taller 
ones in the neighborhood.  An old, old stone wall rings it, 
setting it off from the road below and the houses that surround 
it.  On the top of the hill is a Shinto temple complex -- one 
temple, priests' dwelling, outbuildings, torii, courtyards, 
assorted other accoutrements.

Although no longer in use as a place of worship, the temple is 
far from abandoned.  The buildings are in immaculate condition, 
no overgrowth can be found, and any leaf that dares to fall upon 
its pristine walkways is immediately banished.  The sounds of 
laughter, song and conversation -- and the occasional small 
explosion -- drift through the courtyard, across the wall, and to 
the ear of the casual passerby.

It is a home, a happy one.  A man who found his heart's greatest 
desire lives there.

As does his heart's greatest desire.

And her sisters.

And their brother.

Beware, gentle stranger.  Here be dragons.

Fortunately, though, they're usually very *nice* dragons.

But right now, two large, musclebound idiots are dumping the 
contents of a junkyard into their laps.



1.  In Which I Wake Up Closer To Heaven Than I Want To Be At This 
Point In My Life


The gods love heroes.  They also love a good laugh.  Think about
it.  -- Anonymous

When an evil god laughs, run.  When a good god laughs, run
quickly.  -- Anonymous

I am not now, nor have I ever been, a member of the demigodic
party.  -- Dennis Ritchie



Tokyo, Nekomi Ward, Friday, May 9, 1997, 4:05 PM

Skuld, Norn of the Future, called by some the Raven-Haired and by 
others the Goddess of Technology, may be an eternal, transcendent 
multidimensional being, but at the moment, in this time and 
space, she was a thirteen-year-old girl.  And like many other 
thirteen-year-old girls, she was known to have conflicts with her 
siblings.

Her eldest sister Urd, Norn of the Past, called by some Snowmane, 
by the boys at Nekomi Tech "one seriously hot babe" and by 
herself "the Cupid of Love", was a case in point.  Skuld had 
little use for Urd.  Urd, returning the favor, had little use for 
Skuld.

They avoided killing each other out of consideration for the 
middle sister of the three:  Belldandy, Norn of the Present --
called Verdandi by the Vikings (who were not limited to the 
phonemes found in modern Japanese), "Wishbringer" by the 
administration of the Nekomi Institute of Technology (for lack of 
any other family name), and "Bell-chan" by one Keiichi Morisato, 
who found in her his heart's greatest desire.  Belldandy was one 
of those persons whom it was impossible to hate, whose serenity 
and radiant happiness filled the temple and drove out all but the 
most enduring and persistent thoughts of intersibling homicide.

Killing each other would also have upset their elder brother 
Christopher Angel, known to some as the Lord of Paradox, to 
others as the God of Moments, to his sisters as "Chris", and to 
most of the neighbors as "that godawful huge gaijin from the 
temple."  Two young ladies of his acquaintance (with whose lives 
the collision of divine duty and mortal wishes had entangled his 
fate) called him something else:  "Mine!"  They then usually 
glared at each other for several minutes afterwards.

Chris was charged with the protection of the Norns; his entire 
divine nature was geared to their defense and well-being. 
Sororicide would have upset him greatly, and since they both 
cared deeply about Chris, Skuld and Urd made a great effort to 
keep their conflicts to a manageable level.

Oddly enough, Urd and Skuld did love each other.  The apparent 
contradiction here is a familiar phenomenon to anyone who has 
ever had siblings of their own.  Too much of each other, too 
close, too often has a less than salubrious effect on the 
temperaments of, say, two sisters.  Still, although neither would 
willingly admit it, they cared for each other as strongly as they 
cared for their brother and their mutual other sister.

This did not mean that they had to be civil to one another, 
though.  Witness one interaction between them, late in the 
afternoon of a spring day:

Skuld, a cardboard box the size of a milk crate filling her arms 
and almost completely blocking her field of view, stopped in 
front of the door to Urd's workshop/laboratory.  After the 
fifteenth or twentieth explosion, Belldandy (reluctantly) and 
Keiichi (somewhat less so) had banished the eldest sister's 
"researches" to one of the more distant outbuildings of the 
temple complex.  Walking all the way there from the furo with her 
arms full of a heavy box had done no favors for Skuld's 
temperament.

With an offended little "hmph!" noise, she toed the door open and 
stepped inside.  She gave her eyes a moment to adjust to the 
dimmer light, then walked over to the end of Urd's worktable, 
where there appeared to be enough space to put down her load 
without having to risk actually touching anything.

"Here," Skuld announced curtly, dropping the box.  

As it came to an abrupt rest on tabletop, it made the jangling, 
thudding sound that was somehow so characteristic of unsorted, 
randomly-accumulated junk.

"Thanks ever so much, squirt," Skuld's eldest sister drawled 
without looking up from where she carefully infused droplets from 
a pipette into a small glass bottle.  The contents of both were 
clear; the result was a strawberry-pink cloud floating in the 
larger container.  "What is it?"

"Father had me sort through the parts bin and rescue everything 
we could use and toss out everything that was broken or just 
junk.  This is what's left," the young goddess sniffed.

Having emptied the pipette, Urd carefully laid it down on a white 
cloth.  Deftly, she corked the bottle and labeled it.  "What do 
you mean, 'what's left', brat?  What would be left after you 
rescued the good stuff and tossed out the garbage?"

Skuld pursed her lips in distaste.  "Whatever tested as a relic 
but doesn't seem to have a purpose or a function.  I thought you 
could check them and maybe find out what they are.  Sitting on 
top of the Tether ought to make it easy."

"Hmm."  The white-haired goddess dipped one bronzed hand into the 
box and began fishing through its contents.  "It all looks like 
trash.  Why should I bother?"

"Well!"  Skuld spun on her heel with a huff, long black hair 
spinning momentarily into a broad fan.  "*I* thought you'd be 
interested.  Excuse me for making a mistake!"  

"Little brat," Urd muttered to herself.  

"I *heard* that," Skuld declared with a huff, still standing with 
her back to Urd and her arms crossed.

Urd rolled her eyes and slid off her stool and stepped to the end 
of the table.  She raked her fingers through the box, then lifted 
her hand and studied its contents:  a broken cogwheel, a chunk of 
broomstick, half of a shattered gem.  She scowled and dumped them 
back in with the rest.  "Nothing but junk," she growled.  "I've 
got better things to do."

"Like what?" Skuld demanded, turning around.

Urd graced her with a smile just this side of lascivious.  "Like
a few things you're still *way* too young for, yet."

"You..." Skuld began to steam, but a sudden horrendous crash
interrupted her.  "What was that?"

A second crash, metal upon metal and metal upon stone, even 
louder than the first, shook the little building and rattled its 
windows.  The two goddesses exchanged a look, and then dashed out 
to the courtyard.

                              * * *

Tokyo, Nekomi Ward, Friday, May 9, 1997, 4:15 PM

The thunderous din outside the front of the temple hadn't really 
surprised anyone in the building, but it did bring them running. 
By the time Keiichi and Belldandy reached the site of the 
incident, they found Chris and Skuld already digging through a 
virtual mountain of vehicle parts, sorting them into piles. 
Nearby, Urd lounged idly on the engawa, watching them.

Picking up a headlight assembly, Chris turned it over in his
hands for a moment before noticing the couple.  He tucked it
under his arm and waved.  "Hey kids, did anyone order something
from Junk-We-Be?"

Skuld poked her head up and looked around crossly.  "'Niichan,
did you see a... Oh, give me that!"  Chris handed her the light
and she put it onto the grass beside another one.

Keiichi approached slowly, his brow furrowed in thought.  "I'd 
almost suspect Tamiya-sempai and Ootaki-sempai of entering me in 
another competition," he murmured, and then snapped his fingers. 
"Oh!  The repairs to the clubhouse!  They wanted to drop off some 
gear here..." he trailed off, looking at the pile.  "I just 
didn't think there'd be so *much*."  He frowned, squinted and 
peered at the monstrous heap.  "Is that a whole *car* under 
there?  Where did *that* come from?"

"Well," Belldandy mused, walking over to the pile and looking 
over it, "It looks like there should be enough for a *couple* of 
cars here."  She looked over at her brother, who was turning over 
a black plastic object in his hands with a bewildered expression. 
"Chris, that's a distributor cap."

"Sheesh," Skuld snorted, and tossed a set of spark plugs over her 
shoulder.  "How can you call yourself an engineer and not know 
this stuff?"

"*Computer* and *telecom* engineer, thank you," Chris said 
primly, "not automotive.  And at least I know how to set up a 
decent sound system, unlike some people around here."  He tossed 
the cap onto a pile, dusted his hands off on his pants, and then 
looked with disgust at the grease streaks left on them.  "Well, 
sorry, kids, but you get to clean this up without me.  I have to 
change now for a date, and I want to get going while we've 
still go some sunlight."

"Hey!" Skuld complained, brandishing a strut like a conductor's
baton.  "Who's going to help me with this?"

"Don't be silly," Belldandy soothed.  "Keiichi and I can help
you."  She walked up to Chris and placed her palm on his chest to
stop him.  Murmuring a few words, she looked with satisfaction as
the filth disappeared from his clothes.  She stepped back and
game him a warm smile.

"Slick," Chris said admiringly, and examined his pants.  "Thanks,
Bell.  I need to learn that one."

"No, you don't," a voice said sternly.  They all turned to look 
at Urd where she lounged on the porch.  Standing and joining them 
at the edge of the junk heap, she added, "Mispronounce two words 
in that incantation and you summon a demon lord."

"Really?!" Keiichi demanded, eyes wide.  "Maybe he better not try 
it then.  I remember the ice cube spell.  It took us two days to 
melt that ice."

Skuld snorted from where she was digging in the pile.  "No, 
dummy, not really.  But knowing 'Niichan and magic, he'd probably 
end up sterilizing Nekomi."

"Hey!" the god in question protested, "I'm not that bad!  So I
mixed up two words."

"Christopher." Belldandy said the name firmly, like speaking to a 
child.  "Yes, you are."

With a dejected sigh, Chris slumped and wandered back towards the 
house.  Urd patted him on the shoulder as he walked past her. 
"Don't worry, you've got your own talents."  She said 
sympathetically, and then grinned.  "So who's the date with?"

"Rachel."

Urd's grin became positively evil.  "And if Ami comes by...?"

"I'm out.  God business."

"And if P-mmpf!" Urd glared at her brother as his hand clamped 
over her mouth.

"Don't say it," he pleaded.  "If *she* asks, Thor's gone to storm 
the gates of Hell, and he's letting me hold his cloak."  He 
dropped his hand.

Urd shook her head disgustedly.  "It's not like saying her name 
will make her appear, moron."

"You can take those chances.  *I* won't, thanks.  She scares me." 
Chris turned and hotfooted it into the house.  All could hear 
some coins and keys jingling, and he came out again a moment 
later.  "Late.  Bye-o."  With that, he almost ran down the street 
towards the NIT campus.

A piston in each hand, Skuld blew a lock of her raven hair out of 
her eyes with a puff of breath and watched as he vanished in the 
distance.  "You know, sometimes I think 'Niichan really needs to 
grow a sp...  Oooh!"  Her eyes lit up and she dropped both 
pistons with a matched pair of thuds.  "An electronic ignition 
system!"

She made a lunge for the part while Keiichi chuckled quietly to 
himself.  *She'll never change,* he thought.  As he studied the 
universal joint in his hands, he glanced sidewise at Belldandy 
and smiled fondly.  Under her influence, the parts nearest her 
had animated like props from a Disney movie, and were sorting 
themselves neatly in response to her gentle requests.  He 
chuckled again, then turned back to the task at hand.

How quickly he had gotten used to miracles and wonders, living 
here with Belldandy.  Just beyond the gate to the street was the 
mundane world, but in here... here was magic.  He grimaced as he 
remembered that not all magic was Disney-style fun-and-games. 
Some of it was dangerous, and some of it was dark.  And some of 
it was just damned inconvenient.

But if that were the price to be paid for being with Belldandy, 
then by the gods, Keiichi Morisato was more than willing to pay 
it.  

"Hey, Bell-chan?" he grunted as he rolled a battered transaxle 
off to one side of the courtyard.

"Yes, Keiichi-kun?"  Although she wasn't physically lifting and 
carrying as he was, a certain amount of effort and concentration 
was audible in her voice.  It reminded him once again that magic, 
even the magic of the gods, was not a "get out of work free" 
card, but a kind of labor in its own right, whose toll simply was 
paid later and in different currency.  

He stood up from where he'd maneuvered the transaxle against the 
base of the compound wall.  "I've been thinking about your 
suggestion," he said, rubbing his hands and returning to the main 
junk pile.  "You know, about putting a bench outside by the 
gate?"  He glanced over the next layer to see what needed his 
attention. 

She turned one of her glorious smiles upon him.  "And what have 
you decided, Keiichi?"

He chuckled nervously, resisting the urge to put one grease-
smeared hand behind his head.  "Well, I haven't exactly *decided* 
anything, but I did a little looking around at prices, and I 
think, well, if we manage to stay within our budget for the next 
couple weeks, we could afford a simple hewn-timber bench."  He 
looked around the yard and smiled.  "The one I was looking at 
should go well with the architecture here."

Belldandy didn't *quite* clap her hands in glee, but the 
perceptible brightening of her smile seemed to carry with it the 
same feeling. "How wonderful!  We'll just have to be extra-
careful with all our purchases for a little while, then."

Skuld's head popped up from behind one of the larger drifts of 
metallic debris.  "I don't know why you'd want to *buy* a bench 
when I can build one for you, easy."

"That's because they don't want it to randomly eat passers-by, 
brat," Urd interjected before Keiichi could come up with a 
diplomatic way of expressing much the same concern.

"It *wouldn't* eat random passers-by!" Skuld declared with a 
huff, then ducked back down behind the pile, which was almost as 
tall as she was.  Belldandy and Keiichi shared a grin -- hers 
sisterly and tolerant, his nervous -- when a desultory mutter, 
muffled by the intervening junk, drifted their way:  "It'd only 
eat people who *deserved* it."

The moment was fortunately (in Keiichi's opinion) broken when a 
young woman's familiar voice called out "Hey there!"  As Bell 
quickly dispelled her magical sorting efforts, Keiichi turned to 
see the front gate open.  "Hi, everyone!" said a petite brown-
haired girl as she slipped in and closed the gate behind her.

A timing gear still clutched in one hand, Keiichi stood up 
straight and watched his younger sister Megumi cross the temple 
yard.  She was dressed for the pleasant Spring weather in a 
shimmering white blouse, a black silk vest and khaki slacks so 
crisply pressed that he could see their creases from here. 

"Good afternoon, Megumi!"  Belldandy greeted her with a warm 
smile.  Behind her, the dancing auto parts quietly drifted to the 
ground like exhausted marathon dancers at the end of a long 
night.

"Hi, Bell!" Megumi chirped brightly as she strolled up to the 
junk heap.  She paused a moment to scruffle Skuld's hair with a 
"Hey, kiddo!".  The young goddess ostentatiously rolled her eyes 
and returned to her excavations.

"Yo!" called Urd lazily from where she had returned to her perch 
on the engawa.  Megumi gave her a wave then stepped around the 
pile toward Keiichi with open arms.  "Hey, big brother!" she 
declared; then she finally got a good look at him.  "Urk," she 
said, stopping and drawing back.  "You're all covered with 
grease."  As her arms shifted from imminent embrace to "don't 
touch me", she shook her head. "Sorry, bro.  Love you and all 
that, but this is a new outfit and I *don't* want to mess it up."

"Hey, Megumi," Keiichi said.  He held up the timing gear and gave 
her a sly smile. "The sempais dumped a load of junk on us, and 
we're trying to put it in some kind of order.  Come to help?"

Megumi made a face.  "As *if*," she said.  "I avoided getting 
dragooned for the other end of that mess, and I'm *not* getting 
involved in this end."  She looked around and furrowed her brow. 
"Where's your jerk of a brother?  Why isn't *he* helping?"

Belldandy didn't *seem* to frown, but somehow faint disapproval 
radiated from her.  "Oniichan is on a date right now, Megumi."

"Well, isn't *that* convenient," Megumi snarked.  "At least that
means I don't have to deal with him."

Keiichi suppressed a sigh.  Chris and his sister got along poorly 
at the best of times -- only slightly better than Skuld and Urd 
did, and that was likely due to their somewhat more peaceful 
natures.  It still bothered him that his sister and Belldandy's 
brother couldn't at least make an effort to be civil. Instead, 
Chris descended into an icy over-politeness, and Megumi never 
missed a chance to needle him.  It never escalated to anything 
even approaching an argument, at least not in public; there had 
been a time or two, though, that he thought he might have just 
missed some private, acrimonious exchange between the two.

*One of these days,* he thought, *I'm going to sit those two down 
and find out *why* they seem to hate each other.*  "Don't be like 
that, Megumi," he reproved her gently.  "Chris was helping right 
up until the time he had to leave."

"Yeah!" Skuld piped up without stopping her search through the 
rubble.  She rubbed her face, leaving a long streak of grease 
across one cheek.  "'Niichan was the first one out here after 
those two morons dumped this stuff."  Her eyes suddenly lit up. 
"Ooh!" she squealed and once more began digging furiously.

Megumi laughed once, silently and through her nose, then rolled 
her eyes at her brother.  Keiichi suppressed another sigh and 
simply raised his eyebrows in as bland a manner as he could. 
"So," he said, trying to change the subject as subtly as 
possible.  "What brings you by today?"

She dug into her pocket and withdrew an envelope.  "Care package 
from Mom and Dad.  Here's your share of the latest cash 
disbursement."  Deftly avoiding any of the grease-covered parts 
on the ground around him, Megumi slid the envelope into her 
brother's free hand.

"Thanks," he said, slipping it into his own pocket.  

"Have you eaten yet, Megumi?" Belldandy asked, smiling.  "We're 
having a late dinner tonight, for obvious reasons."  She gave a 
quick, amused glance at the piles of auto parts around her feet. 
"You're welcome to join us, of course.  We'll be done here for 
the evening in just a few minutes."

Megumi dimpled.  "Sure, Bell!  You know I'd never turn down your 
cooking."  She tiptoed through the minefield of metal and grease 
to stand next to Belldandy.  "Just tell me... how can *you* do 
this and stay so *clean* when Big Brother is a greasy mess?"

Belldandy smiled again.  "Well..." she began.

There was a clatter as Skuld dropped an armful of parts.  Keiichi 
turned to see her standing almost on tiptoe, craning her neck 
rapidly left and right.  She spun in place, eyes darting back and 
forth as if searching for something.  The lowering sun stretched 
her shadow out across the yard.

"Skuld?"  Belldandy abandoned Megumi and crossed to her sister's 
side.  "What is it?"

"It's coming," Skuld whispered, then looked up into Belldandy's 
concerned face.  "Oneechan, something's coming!"  

"What's..." Belldandy began, then suddenly stood ramrod straight. 
Like Skuld, she began looking around her, searching for something 
she could sense but not see.  "Oh my.  Yes.  It's coming."

"What?" Megumi asked, frowning.  "What's coming?"

Keiichi felt an unpleasant tingle, reminiscent of a high school 
encounter with a Van de Graaf generator, ripple across his skin, 
and he knew that this was not something ordinary.  "Belldandy!" 
he cried as a wind began to whip up out of nowhere.

She didn't reply.  In eerie synchrony, she and Skuld turned 
together to stare at the dark rectangle of the temple building's 
entrance.  Seeing where their attention was drawn, Keiichi found 
himself staring at the doorway, too; he wondered what, if 
anything, was going to come out of it.  Much magic had been 
worked in that building, far more than he would ever be 
comfortable with; had its residue inadvertently attracted 
something?

Behind him on the engawa, where he couldn't see her, Urd suddenly 
unfolded herself from her drowsy sprawl and stood bolt upright. 
"It's here," she announced in a throaty whisper that somehow 
carried across the windswept courtyard.

A circle of rainbow light erupted in the center of the shadowed 
temple doorway.  Almost before Keiichi could register its 
appearance, the rainbow rippled outward to ring the door frame, 
leaving behind it a sheet of flat, ebony black that filled the 
rest of the entrance.  From out of that dull black surface came 
an unearthly howl that dopplered up the scale even as its volume 
grew, until it was a piercing shriek that drove Keiichi to clamp 
his hands over his ears even as he squeezed his eyes shut against 
the pain.

As the horrific crescendo hammered spikes through his head, 
Keiichi thought of Belldandy and his sister.  He forced his eyes 
open and looked around.  Megumi was on her knees, bent over with 
her head to the ground, her arms wrapped protectively around it. 
Belldandy and Skuld seemed unaffected; instead, they stared, 
seemingly dumbstruck, at the temple door.

Head pounding from the simple effort of moving his eyes, he 
followed their gaze just in time to see a gleaming, flame-trimmed 
black motorcycle burst through the shadowed doorway.  A figure in 
grey hung limply from straps holding him onto its saddle; Keiichi 
couldn't tell if it were an unconscious man or a loose-limbed 
dummy.

As the cycle's rear tire cleared the threshold, the rainbow and 
black manifestation vanished, revealing the temple interior once 
again.  At the same instant the banshee howl abruptly transformed 
into the whine of an unfamiliar engine, its volume far more 
tolerable that it had been a moment before.  Keiichi's headache
vanished.

Wheels spinning and its entire frame surrounded by a faint red 
glow, the cycle took far too long to reach the slate tiles of the 
courtyard; to Keiichi's experienced eye it looked more like a 
plane coming in for a landing than a cycle dropping to the ground 
as if at the end of a jump.  He had no time to ponder this 
observation before the motorcycle, seemingly on its own, began to 
dodge around the heaps of auto parts Tamiya and Ootaki had 
scattered across the temple grounds.  

Whatever controlled the bike was not up to the challenge, though. 
It swerved wildly to avoid a panic-stricken Skuld, and wiped out 
with a resounding crash.  Its rider, suddenly released from the 
straps, flew free as if ejected from its seat.  He hit the ground 
hard, tumbling in a welter of limply flailing limbs until he 
fetched up with a resounding thud against the passenger door of 
the small automobile half-hidden in one of the piles.

Keiichi didn't stop to think.  "Belldandy!" he cried, already 
running to where the leather-clad figure had landed.

"I'm coming, Keiichi!" she called back, dashing along side him.

"What the *heck* was that?" Megumi demanded as she got back to
her feet.  "Where'd this motorcycle come from?"  She blinked.
"And who's *he*?"

                              * * *

In the top of a tree outside of the temple compound, a small, 
implike creature sat, looking down on the frantic activity 
within.  It was not by chance that he was there; he often spied 
upon the inhabitants of the temple, and this day his attention 
had been drawn by an unexpected surge of magic.  Expecting to 
find the goddesses engaged in a ritual working, he was surprised 
instead to witness the appearance of the motorcycle and its 
rider.

As the goddesses and the mortals within the temple walls fussed 
over the unconscious man, the imp nodded to himself.  "Mistress 
Mara will want to know of this."  He smiled to himself.  "Perhaps 
she will reward Senbei for word of this stranger!"  And with this 
thought, he departed, unseen by the mundane inhabitants of the 
city.

                              * * *

Skuld stood and watched pensively as Keiichi and Belldandy, with 
token help from Urd, carried the unconscious driver into the 
temple to take care of him.  In one hand she held an essence flux 
detector she had summoned; the device bleeped disconsolately at 
her every second or so.  *Don't they care about that... that 
*hole* he came out of?* she thought, a petulant glare forming on 
her features. *There's something *very* wrong here.*

Behind her, Megumi said something that Skuld didn't catch.  "Huh? 
What was that?" she said, turning around.

The mortal girl was lifting the stranger's motorcycle upright, 
far too easily.  "I said, check this out, Skuld.  Have you ever 
seen a motorcycle like this before?"  As she spoke, she wheeled 
it over toward the shed where she knew her brother and the others 
sometimes worked on their vehicles.

"Of course!  I've seen all kinds of..." Skuld's indignant 
declaration tapered off as she took her first good look at the 
cycle.  It screamed "movie prop" at her -- streamlined fairings 
and almost organic-seeming cowlings that made it look more like a 
missile on wheels than a proper motorcycle.  And the engine! 
"What *is* that?" Skuld asked.

Megumi had swung the kickstand down and was already poking at the
oddly-shaped motor.  She shook her head.  "I don't know.  It
doesn't look like any kind of internal combustion engine I've
ever seen.  It looks more like a ... a jet engine!  I mean,
check it out!"  She gestured along the length of the device.

Skuld leaned in and examined the engine more closely.  With a
shock, she realized that Megumi was right.  "It's a turbine!" she
said softly.  "A motorcycle with a turbine engine."  She ran her
fingers along a smooth metal housing that hung beneath it.  "And
something else..."

"Really?"  After setting the kickstand, Megumi crouched down next
to the younger girl.

"Yeah, look!"  Skuld began pointing out parts whose purposes were 
suddenly much clearer.  "You can see the fan blades through that 
intake there.  Here're the intercoolers -- wow, strange design --
and all around here, these must be the fuel injectors."  As 
Megumi squat-walked around the bike and studied the intercoolers, 
Skuld slid her finger up along the fuel lines and made a 
discovery.  "Whoa.  That's weird.  The fuel tank can hotswap."

"Like it could use different fuels?" Megumi asked from the other
side of the bike.

"Uh-huh," Skuld replied, nodding.  "And what is it made of?"  She
tapped a fingernail against the block, and received a dull "tok"
rather than the sharp "ping" she was used to.  She looked up at
Megumi.  "I think it's some kind of ceramic."

Megumi frowned.  "Are you sure?"  The younger girl was a
remarkable font of technological information and aptitude, but
Megumi was of the opinion that Skuld had to be wrong about a
machine *eventually*.

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"But there's no known ceramic that can handle the heat and stress
of an internal combustion engine, let alone a turbine!"

"Not down here there isn't," Skuld murmured, then frowned again.
"There is now," she said.  "There is something wrong here."  She
traced her fingers along the mysterious housing below the engine.
"Very wrong."  *That looks like a gravity control system,* she 
mused with a growing scowl.  *Who *is* that guy?*

                              * * *

Taking her leave of Megumi, Skuld dashed into the house and 
sought out the telephone.  As she had hoped, they'd put the 
stranger in Keiichi's room, which was as far away from the phone 
as one could get and still be inside the compound's living 
quarters.  Sparing a quick glance around to make sure she was 
alone, she lifted the handset and dialed a long sequence of 
numbers that connected to no telephone on the mortal plane.

It was answered.

"Hi, Atropos, yeah, it's me.  I think we might have a problem 
here.  I need to talk to Father."

As Skuld stood hunched over the phone, her back to the entrance, 
she failed to notice Megumi enter.  Megumi, for her part, froze 
at the end of the hall when she heard Skuld ask for her father. 
The three sisters rarely spoke of their father, and when they did 
they were maddeningly vague, though it was clear that they felt 
great warmth and love for him.  This was the first time Megumi 
had stumbled upon one of the three actually speaking with him, 
and her curiosity proved far stronger than her sense of 
propriety.  She slid behind a shoji screen and listened.

"Hello, Father," Skuld said.  "I... No, the Tether is just fine. 
It's just that I...  No, Bell's okay, and Urd's... Urd's Urd. 
And Niichan's just fine.  I... No, Keiichi's okay, too.  I... 
Father!  You *know* all this already, why are you asking..."

A pause, then softer, almost contrite.  "Yes, sir.  I understand,
Father."

Another pause.  "There's a... stranger here.  He came through
some kind of planar gate, Father!  Essence all over!  The
Disturbance was huge!"

Behind the shoji screen, Megumi's eyes widened, and she silently
mouthed the words, "planar gate?"

Skuld fumed through another brief silence.  "That's what *I* want 
to know!  Is he a danger?"  

A moment later, her voice shifted from strident to contrite. 
"I'm sorry, Father, I didn't mean to shout at you.  I'm just 
worried about Belldandy and... about Belldandy.  What if he's 
some kind of exotic ploy by the Other Side?"

"What do you mean, I'll just have to find that out for myself?
Father!  Father, don't hang up on me!  Fa...  Oh, poo."

Skuld hung up the receiver with unnecessary roughness and Megumi
slid silently back out of the hallway.  The conversation hadn't
sounded quite like what Megumi'd been expecting, and she wanted
to think about it.

                              * * *

Location Unknown, Date Unknown, Time Unknown

As I have previously mentioned in these chronicles, I am subject 
to unconsciousness when I make a transition from universe to 
universe.  The jump out of Holland Township was no exception.

This time was one of the more comfortable awakenings.  Soft, warm 
bed -- a definite novelty where my arrivals were concerned.  I 
drifted for a little while between unconsciousness and 
consciousness, enjoying the comfort.  But I soon realized that 
there were people nearby, and that discovery prodded me from my 
gentle haze into full awakening.

That was a mistake.  As soon as I threw off enough of my 
drowsiness I realized I ached all over.  Uh-uh.  Rotten landing
this time.  Without opening my eyes I did a quick inventory of
my parts.  Nothing seemed broken, as far as I could tell, but
other than that, I felt like someone had stuffed me in a cement
mixer and turned the sucker on.  Still, it was just pain -- 
ultimately ignorable.  Meanwhile, it was time to see just where
I was.

I opened my eyes to find that I was on a futon or mat in a room 
that looked vaguely 20th-century Japanese in style, to judge from 
the fixtures I could spy.  I was also the center of attention for 
a small crowd.  Three beautiful women, all apparently in their 
twenties -- two Euro, one Asian; one of the Euros was heavily 
tanned, almost nut-brown, with white hair, and the other had 
ivory skin and an ankle-length sheaf of honey-blonde locks.  Oh, 
and the Asian woman was noticeably shorter than the other two. 
One girl in her early teens, Euro, cute, with a peaches-and-cream 
complexion and her own waterfall of jet-black hair.  And an Asian 
guy, just barely taller than the Asian woman; the two bore a 
strong resemblance to each other, just as the three Euros did 
despite their wildly varying skin and hair colors.  The Euros 
also all had odd facial marks, maybe tattoos, and I wondered 
briefly what that might imply.  

The range of expressions directed at me would have been amusing 
had I not been the target -- an assortment that started with 
unabashed concern on the ivory-skinned Euro woman, through a 
devil-may-care grin on the tanned one, to the girl's intense and 
obvious suspicion. The Asian woman and guy both simply looked 
confused, with overtones of worry.

I'm used to provoking a wide variety of reactions from people,
but this was ridiculous.  I mean, I'd been unconscious the entire
time I'd been here so far.  I hadn't had the chance to do
anything obnoxious yet.

"<Um, good morning?>" I croaked in English.

One of the Euro women, the sweet-faced beauty with the 
improbably-long honey-blonde hair, leaned over me and brushed her 
fingertips along my forehead.  The touch left a lingering tingle 
that was strangely pleasant.  "<Late afternoon, actually,>" she 
replied with a gentle smile.  Her voice was as sweet as her 
looks; her bell-like tones were strangely familiar.  "<Are you 
all right? You appeared to be unconscious when you, um, arrived, 
but we couldn't find anything really wrong with you.>"

"<You mean other than the bruises?>"  She nodded and I smiled at 
her.  Then I groaned as I propped myself up into a sitting 
position.  "<Thank you for your concern.  It's a side effect of 
my, um, mode of travel.  Please don't worry yourself about it.>"

At this point the guy said, in Japanese, "Belldandy, who is he?
Is he a..."  He glanced at the Asian woman.  "Can you tell, um,
what side he's on?"

The Asian woman frowned.  "Oniichan!  What's that supposed to
mean?"

I raised my eyebrows.  I had to agree with her; that *was* an odd 
question.  "I am Douglas Sangnoir, sir," I replied in the same 
language, "also called 'Loon' and 'Looney Toons'.  This may be 
hard for you to believe, but I am a traveler from another 
universe, lost and trying to find my way home.  As for the side I 
am on, well," I grinned -- disarmingly, I hoped, "I am a 
professional good guy."

That having been said, my intuition -- or maybe my danger sense --
tugged at the back of my mind, and I dropped into magesight
almost instinctively.  The Asians were normal humans, but the
Euro women and the girl...

Oh.  Shit.

Immediately forgetting my aches and pains, I leapt out of the 
futon and knelt at the feet of the "woman" called "Belldandy". 
"Forgive me, Holy Ones, for invading this your sanctuary," I said 
as quickly as I could.  "With your leave I will gather my 
belongings and depart, and upon my soul I swear that I shall 
disturb you no further."

I stayed there, kneeling, with my head bowed for what seemed like 
a small eternity.  While I'm there waiting, let me explain 
something for those who don't already know it:  I do not like 
dealing with gods.  I've cajoled, bargained and fought with a 
handful of Powers.  Some of them have screwed me over but good. 
A couple more hold markers for favors done for me.  I've killed 
at least one being that claimed to be a deity.  And back home, I 
work for a genuine, bona fide avatar of a goddess.  But I hate 
dealing with gods.  Gods *scare* the piss out of me.  A more 
terrifying combination of utter caprice and world-shattering 
power I have never come across, and that includes the Fae and the 
Elder Ones.

And at that moment I was stuck in a small room with three of
Them.

There was a long moment of silence, then "Belldandy" said softly, 
"Keiichi, Megumi, could we speak privately with Sangnoir-san, 
please?"

"Bell-chan...?" began the Asian guy.  I lifted my head just high
enough that I could watch what was going on.

She turned to look at him, a surprisingly *human* expression of
concern in her eyes.  "Please?  We'll be quite fine.  I'll
explain later."

He swallowed nervously.  "O...okay, if you're sure you'll be all 
right."  Poor kid probably had no idea what she was, if he was 
worried for *her* safety around *me*.  He grabbed the Asian 
girl's hand and dragged her out of the room, closing the door 
behind them.

At the same time, the Euro girl and the platinum blonde stepped
over to stand on either side of "Belldandy".  And stared at me.
The girl *snarled* at me, too.

"Urd, Skuld, be nice," "Belldandy" said.

*Urd?  Skuld?* I thought, then ran "Belldandy" backwards through
Japanese phonetics to get...  "Verdandi?  Shit!" I blurted and
leapt backwards, coming to rest pressed against an outer wall.
"You're the Three!"

                              * * *

"Kei!  *What* is going on here?" Megumi demanded in a whisper as
Keiichi drew the door shut tightly.  "Who is he?  What did he
mean, 'holy ones'?  What is going on?"

"Ssh!" he hissed, his ear to the door.  *Just because Bell-chan
said they were safe doesn't mean I'm not going to make sure.*

Megumi watched for a moment, then shrugged and joined him.

"You're the Three!" came clearly through the thin door, and 
Megumi saw her brother's eyes widen.

                              * * *

Verdandi slowly nodded.  "Yes, but not entirely.  We are...
aspects of Them."

I kept my back to that wall and looked around for my helmet.  I 
spotted it on a table near the door in the far wall.  Damn. 
"Avatars?" I replied, almost as an afterthought.  Well, the Norns 
*were* supposed to be a set of hags in black robes, after all, 
not two twenty-something beauty queens and a snarling bundle of 
early-teen cuteness.

"You can't tell?" the white-haired one -- Urd? -- asked with a
smirk and a shake of her hips.  The girl shot her a venomous
look.

I studied them carefully.  "So, what do you bitches want with me 
*now*?  It wasn't enough that I had to free an entire sentient 
race for you last time, you have to interfere in my search for 
home *again*?"

Yeah, that's me.  A high-performance mouth:  grovel to insult in
6.5 seconds.

They exchanged looks of shock and surprise, but I was wary -- if
there's one thing gods are good it, it's deceiving mortals.  "It
wasn't us.  We didn't do anything," Skuld growled.

"We don't *want* anything, either, buster," Urd added, a frown
crossing her face as she stabbed a forefinger toward me.

"And at this time, and in this place, power of that scale is not
available to us," Verdandi said softly.

"Father forbids it," Skuld amended.

"Father?" I asked.  This was getting more than a little odd...

Verdandi nodded.  "Our Father, who is in Heaven."

"'Harold be thy name,'" I muttered, mostly from force of habit,
and got three sets of very strange looks.  "What *are* you
talking about?  You're *Fate*, for god's... for Pete's sake.  The
other gods are supposed to be subject to your weaving!" I
bellowed at them.

                              * * *

Keiichi grabbed his sister's arm and dragged her away from the
door.  "Um, c'mon, Megumi, we shouldn't be listening to this."

Megumi tore her arm from his grasp.  "Like hell.  What does he
*mean*, 'the *other* gods are subject to *their* weaving'?"  She
glared at her older brother with an intensity that made him
cringe.  "You know, a lot of strange things that I thought were
just my imagination or worse are starting to make sense."

Keiichi gulped.

                              * * *

"In this time and place," Verdandi said quietly, "we are charged
to answer to Another."

"Office politics, huh?" I sneered.  "Must be a major comeuppance
for you three.  Took a big fall, did you?"

There was a swish of wind, and my reflexes took over.  A moment 
later, I found myself holding the shaft of something that looked 
like a croquet mallet by way of Star Trek.  Its head was mere 
centimeters from mine, and Skuld throttled its handle in a 
double-fisted deathgrip.  "We didn't *Fall*!" she shouted as she 
tried to free her weapon from my grasp.  "No one Fell!"

I inclined my head toward her as I looked at the other two.
"Discipline problem, eh?"  Then a thought struck me.  "Those two
you sent out of the room.   Do they know what kind of creatures
you are?  Or are they living in danger and ignorance?"

"Megumi's just visiting," Urd said off-handedly.  "And Keiichi is
Bell's..."

"Keiichi is my love," whispered Verdandi.

This shocked me so much I let go of the mallet, and Skuld
promptly nailed me in the foot with it.

When I got done yelping and jumping around, I relieved the kid
of her hammer and turned back to Verdandi.  "Your *what*?"

"My love," she repeated, almost too softly for me to hear.

I blinked at her, then shook my head.  "You know, that's... 
that's..."  I *was* going to say something like "pathetic", or 
maybe "disgusting".  We'd had quite enough of that stuff with the 
Olympians, after all; with all the other damage that they do to 
the world, deities should *not* play with human hearts.  Plus, 
the relative power levels made it pretty damn likely that it 
wasn't exactly the most equitable of relationships.  Poor guy. 
Talk about being pussy-whipped.  But my danger sense chose that 
moment to smack me on the back of the head, and I realized that 
insulting a god-human relationship to the involved god's face was 
probably not the wisest course of action.

Okay, now those who know me and the Warriors will say, "Hey, you 
never had a problem with Hexe dating men."  Well, for all that 
Hexe is bossy, dominant, pushy *and* a deity, she is also one of 
the most *human* beings I have ever known.  When I see her with a 
guy, I don't see a monstrous, alien creature of immense power 
manipulating some poor schlmazel for its own amusement.  I see a 
woman with a guy.  Say what you will about her abrasive and 
overbearing personality, Hexe is a woman first, and a deity 
second.  And in my experience, that was *unique*.  I had no 
reason to believe Verdandi's relationship with Keiichi Morisato 
was anything but a sadistic and/or exploitative dalliance for 
her.

Anyway, it was at that moment that a shriek erupted from the
other side of the door to save me from my own mouth.  "Belldandy
is *WHO*?"

I raised an eyebrow.  "I take it she didn't know?"

"THE JERK, TOO?"

Urd smirked.  "Nope," she said as Verdandi pursed her lips and
Skuld's eyes grew large.

"DOES THAT MEAN..." came from the hallway, then Megumi's voice
dropped to an outraged mumble.

"I think," I said, suppressing an urge to sing-song, "that 
somebody's in trouble."

The door burst open, and Megumi stormed back into the room, 
dragging her brother by the collar behind her.  "Where's this 
Mara character?" she roared, and all three goddesses jumped, then 
as one turned to look at her.  "Turn *me* into a car, will she? 
Possess *my* body, will she?  When I get my hands on her, she'll 
be one dead..."  She jabbed a finger at Urd.  "You!  How could 
you let me think that was just a *dream*, that it was my 
imagination?  Do you *know* what it's done to my self-image?" 
She whirled on Skuld, who eeped.  "And *you*, you're just as bad. 
You can't believe what it felt like to think I was crazy because 
of all the strange crap that goes on around here because of you 
four!"

"Why aren't you yelling at Belldandy?" Urd muttered, but Megumi
evidently heard her.

The mortal girl suddenly dropped completely out of rage and into
utter embarrassment.  "I couldn't!" she replied, doing some odd,
rhythmic twiddling thing with the tips of her forefingers.
"She's so nice, I'd just feel so *guilty* afterwards."

I hazarded a glance at the divinity in question, who simply
smiled a beatific smile.  Uh-huh.

"Why aren't you yelling at Keiichi, then?" Skuld grumbled.  "He
hid it from...  eep!"  Skuld interrupted herself when I grabbed
her collar and yanked her up for a nose-to-nose conference.

"Did Keiichi have a choice?" I demanded.

"We never really told him not to..." she breathed.  I wasn't
satisfied.

"Did *you* sit Megumi down and let her know what was going on?" I 
demanded.

"No," she squeaked.

"Then don't start throwing blame at other people, kid.  It's not 
polite.  Apologize to the man."  Yes, I knew I was giving orders 
to the avatar of a goddess.  No, I really didn't care, because my 
foot was still hurting and I was feeling just a bit peevish 
towards her.  I shook her gently, just a little.  "Apologize," I 
repeated, adding a little menace to my voice for effect.

                              * * *

Tokyo, Nekomi Ginza, Friday, May 9, 1997, 5:26 PM

Chris was having one of those feelings, and it was ruining his 
date.  It wasn't fair to Rachel, or to him for that matter, but 
he honestly couldn't help feeling that the other shoe was going 
to drop, and it was probably going to land on him.

Like a one tonne weight.

The little voice in his head that was *insisting* that he was not 
only right for thinking so, but that he really should have known 
better than to try in the first place, wasn't helping much, 
either.

Growling a mental "shut up" to his more cynical (and, he was 
ruefully willing to admit, probably wiser) side, Chris gave his 
utmost effort to enjoying the walk, the scenery of the ginza, and 
the company, who had been downright forward (for her) in slipping 
her hand into his earlier.

Chris was feeling somewhat proud of himself by the time they had 
walked another block.  Not only had he actually started to enjoy 
himself, he had managed to resist his techie urges and not drag 
Rachel into every single computer and game store they passed.  He 
was somewhat more proud of himself for not groaning every time 
Rachel considered stopping in an athletics or clothing store --
or for being too eager when she stopped for a good 30 seconds 
considering the swimsuit shop.

As they crossed the street toward the movie theatre, Chris felt 
Rachel's hand tighten almost painfully in his, and heard a little 
growl from her throat.  He followed her angry glare to its 
target, and sighed.

Sending another mental "shut up" to the voice in his said that 
was gleefully singing "I told you so", he extricated his hand 
from Rachel's and shook it to restore the blood flow.  "Hi, Ami," 
he said resignedly.  "Would it be bad of me to ask what brought 
you here?"  He looked the policewoman up and down, and wry smirk 
formed on his face.  "In uniform, no less?"

"Oh, nothing," she replied sweetly, and twirled her baton.  "Just 
taking a break from writing tickets and directing traffic."

"Ami," Chris said sternly, "isn't your assigned area about forty 
blocks from here?"

"So?"

The growl in Rachel's throat had finally worked itself around to 
speech. "Fine," she said icily.  "Why don't you just finish the 
date with her then, Chris?"

"Now wait a sec-"

"Don't be silly," Ami interrupted.  "I just came by to say hello, 
that's all."

"Oh, so I'm silly, am I?" Rachel snarled.

Chris began to sweat.  "That's not..."

"Will you settle down, schoolgirl?  Can't I check up on my 
investment?"

"SCHOOLGIRL?  I don't have to take that from a wannabe cop-ette!"

"COP-ETTE?!"

"Oh Lord," Chris swore under his breath, not really caring about 
the trouble he'd get in.  "Here we go."  He looked up into the 
sunset-washed sky and scowled slightly.  "You know, guys, Urd, 
Skuld, and Bell really don't need your help screwing up my 
love life, they've got it more or less handled."

"Well at least I'm not teasing him like a frigid BITCH!" Ami 
snapped.

"HEY!" Chris roared, and the two women turned to him, shocked. 
"If you two want to fight, fine, but:  One, keep it clean; and 
two, *leave me out of it*.  It's not my fault we're stuck like 
this, and unless you want me to--"  He broke off suddenly, and 
his face paled.

The women watched in bewilderment as a blank look came upon 
Chris' face.  His hair lightened to a tan as his skin became 
almost ivory.  His god-marks, which they had been convinced were 
mere tattoos, began to glow visibly in the fading daylight; his 
rectangular forehead mark slowly bent and warped until it was two 
vertical lines bracketing a shorter one.  "Skuld," he whispered, 
and then disappeared.

"What happened?" Rachel whispered.  "Where did he go?"

Ami bestowed a withering glare on Rachel.  "Don't you ever 
listen?  He's supposed to protect his sisters.  I'm betting the 
brat's in trouble."

"Serves her right," Rachel muttered to herself, and sighed. 
"There goes the date."

"I don't believe you!" Ami exclaimed.  "The kid's in big trouble, 
and no one deserves that.  Come on, schoolgirl, we've got to get 
to the temple!"   She checked her watch and winced.  "The chief 
is going to kill me," she moaned.

"Pity," Rachel said as she began to run down the street, leaving 
Ami behind. "And don't call me that!"

                              * * *

Tokyo, Nekomi Ward, Friday, May 9, 1997, 5:27 PM

One of Skuld's hands darted for a pocket, and I grabbed for it 
with my free arm as she brought it back out.  In her grip was 
something which looked like a chrome baseball that had visited a 
plumbers' and electricians' convention.  At the time I didn't 
know why she'd even use one, but it was a safe bet that it was a 
grenade of some sort.  Her tiny hand was wrapped around it; my 
much larger hand, still in its leather glove, was wrapped firmly 
around hers.  "Uh-uh, kid.  No toys.  Or do you want to take your 
sisters out *with* me?"

She considered this for a moment, then shook her head.  "Very
good.  Now apologize to the nice man."

"I'm sorry, Keiichi," she forced out between gritted teeth.  The
gentleman in question just laughed nervously.  Megumi simply
stared with huge eyes.

"Now that wasn't so hard, was it?"  Watching her carefully, I 
released her hand, and she slipped the whatever-it-was back into 
her pocket.  When both of her hands were visible again, I lowered 
her back to the ground -- but I didn't let go of her now 
somewhat-wrinkled collar yet.

I put her down just in time to see the other two goddesses with
glowing balls of light hovering between their palms.  Urd glared
angrily, but Verdandi simply looked... concerned.  "Are *those*
for *me*?" I asked mockingly with one of my special "oh, please
attack me, do" smiles.

"No," said Verdandi as the light in front of her simply vanished
and she folded her hands around each other.

Then I felt a prick at the side of my neck.  Somewhere starboard
of me, just out of my peripheral vision, a male voice -- an
*angry* male voice -- rasped, "Let go of her.  *Now*."

Even as I felt a moment of odd deja vu -- I'd been on the other 
end of this kind of conversation a couple of hundred times -- I 
was sorting very, very quickly through all my options.  Slowly I 
turned my head and smiled politely at the nice man -- the nice 
*huge* man -- the nice huge *god,* my mage-sight told me -- with 
the arm-mounted pigsticker and the blue-green armor.

Then I spoiled the effect by saying, "And whomsoever art *thou*, 
in thy cast-iron tuxedo?"  I gave the armor a second look.  "I 
take it that Navajo turquoise plate mail is 'in' this season?"

                              * * *

Chris scowled at the man as he made his smart-ass remark, and 
flicked his eyes over Skuld's form to make sure she was 
uninjured.  Admirable, but it was the kind of lapse his opponent 
was looking for, as he threw Skuld at Chris.  *What the... hey!*

At the same time, he batted the sword arm out the way and hooked 
Chris' leg with his foot, and the three of them fell to the 
floor.  Instead of falling like Chris and his sister did, though, 
the guy rolled into a handstand and flipped over the tangle, and 
went running out the door.

*Okay, I'm impressed.  That was a bloody work of ART,* Chris 
reflected.  *Combination of at least three different martial 
arts, there, and the guy was smart enough to dump us in such a 
way that we'd be tangled up, speaking of which...*  "SKULD, GO 
LIMP!" he barked, and marveled at how once in her life she 
actually listened to him.

Without Skuld's struggling to interfere with him, Chris managed 
to get to his feet in a couple of moments.  "Okay," he growled, 
"I'm going after that guy."  As Belldandy and Urd began to speak, 
he overrode them.  "STAY HERE."

Going into no time and running out the door, Chris felt the power 
of the Full Manifestation, which had been hovering on the point 
of activation the whole time, subside.  *Okay, smart guy.  You 
clearly didn't want to hurt me or Skuld, because you could have 
done either. Fair enough, I won't hurt you... much.* 

Behind him, he was pretty sure he heard Urd mutter, "Thor and
his stupid training."

                              * * *

As they gently hit the floor I rolled over the tangled heap of 
god and goddess into a one-handed handstand that took me back to 
my feet free of unpleasant encumbrances like pointed swords. 
Before Blueboy and the Brat could untangle themselves, I snagged 
my helmet off the table.  Then I shot out the door while rattling 
off a quick thanks for the hospitality to Verdandi and Urd.  My 
intent was to get to my bike and get the hell out of Dodge.  I 
didn't care where I was going to go; I'd worry about that once I 
was in the air and accelerating at as many Gs as I could stand in 
any random direction that took me away from these... creatures.

My helmet was fortunately still turned on and in combat mode, so 
I didn't have to wait for it to boot or anything.  I just shoved 
it on my head as I made a dash for the first visible exit, 
combat-hyping as I went.  I'd just managed to get the chin strap 
buckled when I burst out into the early part of an evening's 
twilight.  I stopped short on a porch to peer around, looking for 
my cycle in the fading light and growing shadows.  "Ah, hell," I
muttered when I made out the irregular shapes scattered across the 
ground in front of me.  "I'm in a goddamned junkyard."

Then something blew through my field to hit me in the back, and I 
went flying into the middle of the scrap heaps.

Just like it's supposed to, the polykev absorbed almost all of 
the blow.  I rolled with the rest of it, taking advantage of the 
momentum it had imparted and letting it carry me almost all the 
way to what had to be a perimeter wall.  Right before I hit, I 
twisted slightly and popped back up to my feet facing the way I'd 
come from, feeling the faintest heat on my face as my armor 
radiated away the energy it had absorbed.  

There he was.  The Turquoise Titan was standing on the porch of a 
very traditional-looking Japanese house that seemed quite out of 
place amidst all the heaps of rusted and greasy metal.  His feet 
were spread almost a meter apart and his face bore a hideous 
scowl.  His armor was... interesting, a weird mix of medieval and 
high-tech.  His sword arm -- and I was surprised to realize that 
the sword really did seem to be an integral part of the armor --
was swung back almost behind him, and his shield arm was forward 
as if he'd just thrown a punch with it.  He probably had -- that 
impact *had* felt more like a shield bash than a thwarted blade 
thrust.

I was lucky he'd decided just to bash me.  The shield -- it was 
more of a buckler, really, attached to his arm at or near his 
wrist -- was vaguely teardrop-shaped, with its own sharp, wicked 
point sticking out over his clenched fist.  *Damn,* I remember 
thinking at that moment.  *Alberich would have *loved* to have 
seen the style this guy uses.  Can you fight Florentine with a 
pointed buckler for your main-gauche?*

*He sure looks mad,* I continued to myself, changing mental 
tracks.  *But what the hell, might as well try to reason with him 
first.*  I raised my hands slowly in what I hoped was a non-
threatening manner.  "Look, Lancelot," I called out.  "I don't 
want a fight.  I just want to..."

I didn't get a chance to finish because the next thing I knew, 
Blueboy had *blipped* from the porch 30 meters away to right in 
front of my face.  The moment I realized what he'd done, I threw 
myself to the side -- just in time to avoid a vicious swing of 
that sword.

"Teleporter, eh?" I muttered to myself as I let the roll carry me 
back to my feet again.  Well, I had a counter to *that*. 
"System, 'Freeze Frame'.  Play!"  I got ready to invoke a freeze 
first chance I got.  Nothing like a good old-fashioned timestop 
to screw over a teleporter with.

Except it didn't work as I'd expected.

     "<I could see it was a rough-cut Tuesday
      Slow-motion weekdays stare me down...>"

The moment that the J. Geils Band kicked in, there was this 
hideous, gut-wrenching *jolt* unlike anything I'd ever felt when 
using the song before.  Panicked, I looked around.  It'd gone 
right into a timestop without waiting for me to invoke one.  That 
wasn't supposed to happen.

Timestops are weird to begin with.  Everything takes on a bluish 
cast -- in this case even deeper than the combination of my 
combat hype and the fading twilight had already given it.  Sound 
is faintly muted, as though you're wearing earmuffs.  Moving 
objects, well, they're the first obvious thing people think about 
when they hear "timestop".  Looking around, I spotted a couple 
birds on the wing hanging motionless in midair, silhouetted 
against the setting sun; the goddesses and their mortal dupes 
were halted in mid-dash as they all tried to pile Keystone Kops-
style through the narrow doorway I'd run through.  Just like it 
was supposed to, everything around me had frozen in place -- no 
wind, no sound, no movement.  

Everything, that is, except for the very large, very angry, very 
*un*frozen god with the armor and the sword.

And *that* wasn't supposed to happen, either.

     "<...There were no defects to be found
      Snapshot image froze without a sound...>"

"Shit!" I swore under my breath, and ran at him.  There was a 
source of mystical power nearby, I realized as I prepared to 
spring.  I could sense it, even without magesight.  Not the most 
powerful one I'd ever encountered, no, but close, very close. 
Almost close enough to touch.  And very focused, constrained 
even.  Strange.  Maybe he was using that, somehow, to sync up
with my timestop.

Pity I wouldn't get a chance to investigate it.  However this 
fight went, I wouldn't be hanging around.

I leapt, spun, and laid my bootheel across the side of his helm. 
The impact made a muffled, metallic thud in the preternatural 
quiet, and his head snapped to one side; his body followed as he 
went into a half-spin that ended with him dropped to one knee.

Next thing I know, the colors are shifted back to normal, the 
goddesses and the girl are shrieking, the short guy with them is 
yelling, and Blueboy is staggering backwards with a growl.
Something had yanked both of us back out of timestop.  

                              * * *

*Rat bastard, that hurt!* Chris thought as his brains stopped 
spinning.  *This guy hits hard enough to impress Magni.*

Snarling, Chris looked around to where his opponent had gone.  A 
portion of his mind noted that things seemed weird -- there was a 
bluish tinge to the world, which was suddenly in shadow.  Out of 
the corner of his eye, he saw a couple birds frozen in mid-air.

*A time-stop,* Chris realized.  *This guy can mimic what I do. 
Not good.  Most emphatically not good.*  He ran through his 
options mentally:  his full manifestation had abandoned him when 
Skuld was out of danger, which meant a lot of his advantages had 
left him, and this guy's ability to copy his time-stop power 
stole his biggest remaining one.

*I'm going to have to actually win this fight on skill.*  With a 
mental shrug, Chris jumped at his opponent.  *That's why I get 
paid the big bucks.  Wait... do I get paid?*

                              * * *

Damn.  That kick would have knocked anything *mortal* for a loop. 
I should have realized that he'd be at least as tough as Hexe.

I never could beat Hexe one-on-one, not even with every dirty 
trick and low blow in my arsenal.

With a thought I invoked another freeze.  That same gut-wrenching 
jolt hit me again, and once more it was Blueboy and me in the 
Land That Time Forgot.  I dropped and tried a legsweep on him. 
As he leaped over it, I said, "Just what *is* your problem?  All 
I wanted was for the kid to apologize to the guy."  I took the 
followthrough of the sweep and let it carry me into a roll along 
the ground just in time to avoid getting speared by that blade of 
his.  I kicked upwards and knocked his arm away long enough to 
kippup back to my feet.

Just in time to get smashed in the head by the shield on his 
*other* arm.  The guy may have been the size of Broot, but he 
moved like Maggie, dammit.  I went tumbling across the yard 
again, my head ringing like the temple bell that I nearly fetched 
up against from all the various auto parts I hit along the way. 
The light had changed when he hit me, and I realized we were back 
in real time again.  Double dammit.

"Oh, like I'm supposed to believe that," he sneered as I rolled.

*Buddy,* I thought blearily, *the state you're in right now, 
you'd say I was lying if I told you you were *tall*...*  Another 
wrench hit me, but this time I didn't notice any changes in the 
light.  *What the...  I didn't do that...*  

"SHIT!" I yelled as my reflexes took over.  My opponent could 
*fly*, too, dammit!  He'd taken to the air and shot across the 
compound at me.  I barely got out of the way in time -- he came 
at me sword-tip first, and with an impressive "thud!" the blade 
drove into one of the heavy wooden posts supporting the bell 
shelter, burying itself like a 9-penny fired from a nail gun.

*Jolt* and we were back in real time.  The rapid transitions back 
and forth were starting to make me queasy -- and that takes some 
doing, let me tell you.  I had to come up with something to put 
this guy down fast so I could get on my bike and get the hell 
away from this madhouse.  It occurred to me that this bozo had 
one weak point that Hexe didn't.  While he tugged on his sword 
blade to free it, I turned around and delivered the most 
devastating blow I could think of at that moment.

As the audience shrieked at us in outrage, my steel-toed boot met 
his metal codpiece.  

So I don't fight by Marquis of Queensbury rules.  Or even Marquis 
of *Doonesbury* rules.  Sue me.  I fight to *win*, dammit.

Let me tell you, neither one of us was happy in the moments 
immediately after that kick.  But at least I could start 
stumbling through the twilit yard toward a lumpy shape that 
looked like it could be my cycle.  

                              * * *

One of the advantages of being a god, Chris reflected at that 
moment, was that a kick in the crotch was not *nearly* as 
crippling as it might once have been.  Plus, he was prepared. 
Early on his training, during one of the free-for-alls that the 
other gods had insisted were the best way to get him up to speed, 
Sif had pretended to cozy up to him and then kneed him in the 
groin.  His reaction -- mostly leftover reflex from being a 
mortal -- had cost him that fight *and* earned him a lot of 
ribbing from Thor.  

Shortly after the humiliation, he had to endure yet another 
lecture from Tyr, this one on the physical differences between 
gods and mortals -- even male ones.  Chris then worked with one 
of the dwarven armourers to have his groin armor rebuilt to 
eliminate any future problems along those lines.  It wouldn't 
stop everything, but the plate and padding diverted most of the 
force of impact away from sensitive areas.  He'd drawn the line 
at putting spikes on it like Njord had suggested, though.  *Okay, 
he had a point,* he snarled angrily as he dispelled his blade. 
He looked around.  *Now where'd that stinking rat bast... aha!*

It took only three quick steps to catch up to the limping man in 
leather.  Chris grabbed him by the collar.  "You know, sparky," 
he said conversationally, "that wasn't nice, and pretty damn 
low."  Then he threw the guy as hard as he could into the 
compound wall.

                              * * *

The impact knocked the wind completely out of me, and I dropped 
to the ground belly first, ending up with my nose buried in a 
pile of timing chains.  As I levered myself back up onto hands 
and knees, all I could think of was, *Who *is* this guy?*  The 
dark hair didn't suggest any of the Norse pantheon, and *none* of 
them had freckles, last I knew.  Besides, they tended to be built 
like bears, while this guy was more like a tree:  tall, slender, 
sturdy without a huge amount of bulk.  

Even so, he was easily big enough to be Thor or Heimdall.  But 
Thor didn't use swords, and by all accounts he was bearded.  And 
Heimdall...  I seemed to remember something about gold teeth, 
which this guy didn't have either.  Both eyes, not Odin.  Both 
hands, not Tyr.  And Loki should still be tied to a rock enjoying 
the Viking version of Chinese water torture.  I couldn't think of 
any of the other Aesir or Vanir before he was charging me again. 
At least his *temper* said "Norse" in great big capital 
letters...

Not that it mattered.  He was a god.  Bad news, any way I looked 
at it.

Well, "Freeze Frame" wasn't helping me any here.  Might as well 
go on a full offensive, since I seemed to have no other choice if
I wanted to get away from here under my own power and direction. 
I needed to come up with something to stop this guy.  Maybe I 
could knock him out with one of my really big guns.

"System," I muttered.  "'Lightning's Hand.'  Play."  With the 
change in songs the flow of energies released, then embraced me 
again.  I let the lightning out enough to cloak me in the usual 
sheet of rolling, crackling blue-white sparks.  Then I cocked my 
my fist back, filling it with enough loose, angry electrons that 
the skin of my hand *buzzed*, and set myself to receive his 
charge.  "Come'n'get it, god-boy," I called out.

"Don't call me 'god-boy,' *pipsqueak*!" he snarled as his sword
rippled back into existence around his arm.

"That's *quite* enough!* a throaty, melodious female voice 
declared from the side.  There was a flash of light and a 
thunderous blast, and everything went black.

                              * * *

"Urd, was that really necessary?" Belldandy remonstrated softly 
as her elder sister lowered her hands.

"Yes," Urd declared flatly.  "Any more testosterone in the air, 
and I would've needed to shave tomorrow morning."  She glanced 
toward either end of the temple yard, where the two combatants 
had been flung by the force of her levinbolt; not surprisingly, 
each had landed in a pile of auto parts.  "They're still moving," 
she said with a sigh.  "You and Keiichi ... and Megumi," she 
added as an afterthought, "should probably go hold our guest 
down.  Skuld and I will take care of 'Niichan."

Belldandy nodded.  "Very well."

Urd strode off toward Chris; Skuld trotted after her, a not-
unfamiliar scowl darkening her face.  "If he hurt 'Niichan..." 
the younger goddess growled, letting the threat trail off 
uncompleted as she glanced over her shoulder toward the other end 
of the courtyard.

"'Niichan's a big boy," Urd replied calmly.  "He can take a lot."

Skuld's deepening scowl was evident in her voice.  "I don't care. 
That jerk's a mortal *and* he was slinging around enough magic 
to..."  The two stopped, having reached their brother.

"Softer, Skuld.  My head's still ringing," Chris groaned.  "Who 
lobbed the powerbolt at us?"

"Me!" Urd replied brightly.  

Chris reached up slowly and rubbed his eyes.  "Thank you ever so 
much.  We are going to have a little talk about this later, you 
understand?"

She shrugged.  "Hey, it stopped the fight."

"Whatever."  Chris tried to push himself up off the ground, 
failed, tried again, and failed again.  "Ouch."

Skuld gave an exasperated sigh.  "Here, 'Niichan," she said, 
holding out a hand.

With an aggrieved look on his face, Chris took the offered hand. 
As Skuld pulled, he pushed, and with a grunt of effort from both 
of them he was back on his feet again amidst a clatter of falling 
debris.  With a thought he dismissed his armor.  "Okay, so, who 
was he?" he asked his sisters.  Looking around the courtyard, he 
added, "And where is he?"

"C'mon," Urd replied, holding out her hand.  "I'll tell you what 
we know."

"Are you okay, 'Niichan?" Skuld asked anxiously.

Chris took a moment to assess himself.  "Yeah, I think so.  Just 
a few aches and pains.  Nothing that a couple of days in the furo 
wouldn't fix."

Skuld nodded absently.  "All right.  I've got something I want to 
check into out here, then.  I'll be inside in a little bit."

"Fair enough."  He looked at Urd.  "Okay, let's go.  And start 
from the beginning."  

"Well, it wasn't long after you left on your date..." Urd began 
as the two headed for the house.

Skuld watched them go inside, then glanced at the storage shed 
where Keiichi kept his various bikes, and where they had parked 
Sangnoir's strange, intriguing motorcycle.  A smile broke across 
her face as a most uncharitable thought occurred to her, 
something petty, unkind and completely unworthy of a young 
goddess.  *But it would be *so* satisfying.*  Still smiling, she 
headed for the shed, practically skipping with a smug delight. 
"Now where did I put my toolkit?" she sing-songed to herself.

                              * * *

"I've got a question for you, Urd," Chris said with elaborate 
casualness once Urd reached the point where she'd thrown the 
levinbolt.  They had reached the house and now stood near the 
step-stone which led up to the engawa.  "Have you ever considered 
the concept of 'subtlety?'"  

"Have you ever considered the concept of 'ask first, fight 
later?'" she retorted primly.  "What possessed you to try and 
slaughter that guy, anyway?"

"I wasn't going to kill him," he said sourly.  "Only maim him, a 
little."  He visibly winced at the flat look his eldest sister 
gave him.  "It's not my fault!  That little Full Manifestation 
dealie that got dumped in my head was saying 'Skuld in danger,' 
so I fly over here and what do I see but Skuld being menaced in 
what looked a hostage situation.  I did what I thought was 
appropriate."

Urd gave a skeptical snort.  "And then *after* she was out of 
danger, you decide to go after the guy.  What is it with you? 
You did the same thing to Mara!"

"I'm supposed to just let bad guys run away and come back to 
fight another day?  When exactly did our life become a cheesy 
comic book?"

Urd smirked a little as she glanced toward the gate.  "I'd say 
yours has been one for a while."  With a nod of her head, she 
indicated the two women running across the yard towards the 
house.

"Crud," Chris muttered.  "Think I can pretend he killed me?"

                              * * *

Location Unknown, Date Unknown, Time Unknown ... Again

Consciousness returned to me rather suddenly, but I didn't open
my eyes right away.  "<'From my heart and from my hand,'>" I 
whispered when I remembered what had happened, "<'why don't 
people understand my intentions?'>"

"Ah, Sangnoir-san, you're awake.  Good."  

I opened my eyes.  *Hm.  This ceiling looks familiar.*  

I was once again sprawled on the same futon in the same room 
where I had awakened earlier.  How much earlier I had no idea; 
all I could tell was that it was now completely dark out, thanks 
to a view of a window through the door.  No helmet again -- and 
this time it wasn't even in the room.  Damn.  I was also once 
more the center of attention.  This go-round it was just Verdandi 
and the two mortals -- Keiichi and Megumi, if I recalled 
correctly.  They both looked like they were each clamping down on 
about a million questions that threatened to spill out of them.

"Okay," I rasped.  "Not that I'm complaining or anything, but how 
come I'm not dead?"

Verdandi made a little moue with her lips.  "Don't be silly.  We 
wouldn't let that happen.  Besides, while Oniichan can be a bit 
overprotective at times, he would not kill indiscriminately."

"Coulda fooled me," I growled.  I could still feel every hit I 
took from him, even where the polykev intercepted most of the 
force.  Then I finished parsing what she'd said.  "'Oniichan'?" I 
asked, turning my head to look directly at her.  "Since when have 
the Norns had an older brother?  *How* can the Norns have an 
older brother?"

Verdandi just smiled blandly at me.  "If you want, you may use 
the furo," she said without even acknowledging my question. 
"Then, if you're hungry, and I'm sure you must be, I'll have a 
little something waiting for you in the dining room.  Keiichi," 
she turned to the guy.  "Why don't you show Sangnoir-san to the 
bath?"

One hand went behind his head and he laughed nervously.  "Are you 
sure, Bell-chan?" he asked.  I could see the barest traces of an 
"are you out of your fucking mind?" expression in his eyes, but 
it was almost completely buried in what I could tell on sight was 
an absolute and complete trust.  

Megumi was a little less trusting, and it showed.  As she opened 
her mouth for what was likely to be another prize rant, I sighed 
as loudly as I could.  "I promise I'll behave, Keiichi-san," I 
said as I levered myself back up to a sitting position.  The girl 
shuffled backwards ten or twenty centimeters on her knees, but 
Verdandi and Keiichi stayed put.  Poor kid.  She tried to hide 
it, but she was scared out of her wits, and not just of me, I'd 
wager.  I gave a knowing look to Verdandi.  "If there is any oath 
I could swear, be it Norse or Japanese..."

"Don't be silly," she repeated with a brilliant smile.  "You don't
need to swear any oaths."  She favored Keiichi with a look that 
almost convinced me that she *did* love him the way a human woman
would.  "Please, Keiichi?  I'm quite certain Sangnoir-san is no
threat."

"I'll do my best to be a proper guest," I offered.  "This time,"
I added with an apologetic little smile.

Megumi stared with her mouth open, looking at each of the three 
of us in turn.

Keiichi still had his doubts, I could see that.  But he nodded 
and stood.  "Sangnoir-san?"

"Right."  I managed to get to my feet with only one little grunt 
of pain (oh, okay, maybe not *that* little), then spent a moment 
or two rolling my head and working my back, listening to and 
feeling each pop and crack.  "Okay," I announced when I was done 
with that.  "Lead on, MacDuff."

"This way," he said, giving me a funny look and gesturing me 
through the door.  I stepped out into the hall, and waited for 
him to follow and close the sliding panel behind us.  Damn, but I 
towered over this guy.  I mean, he was no midget, but hell, even 
Crystal was taller than he was; I easily had a head and a half on 
him.

When he turned back to me I bowed as best I could in the narrow 
passage.  "Please accept my apology for disturbing the wa of the 
house, Keiichi-san," I offered in my most formal Japanese. 
(Well, except for the honorific.  He struck me as the kind of guy 
who'd be uncomfortable with "-sama", let alone "-dono".)  A 
hallway wasn't the proper place for this kind of thing, but I 
felt that it was more important to do it now, rather than wait.

Keiichi just rubbed the back of his head with one hand and 
laughed nervously.  "It's okay, really," he said. "C'mon, the 
furo's this way."  He began to lead me down the hall.

"Thanks."  My boots made dull thuds on the polished wood floor.
As soon as I could I'd have to take them off and get into a 
pair of house slippers.

He glanced back at me.  "You'll need some bathing supplies, 
right?"

I nodded.  "Yes, please."

"No problem, we've got spares you can use."  He smiled wryly. 
"We get a lot of guests -- expected and not."  We stopped by an 
partly-open door, beyond which I could see a tiled floor.  "Here 
we are," he said unnecessarily.

I pushed the door open and saw the changing room.  At its far end 
another door held a sign that read "available".  I nodded to 
myself, then glanced back at my host.  "Thank you, Keiichi-san."

He grimaced.  "Just 'Keiichi', okay?"

I grinned back at him.  "Okay, then.  Just 'Keiichi' it is.  And
I'm just 'Doug' to my friends."

"Thanks... Doug."  He smiled, still a little nervously I thought, 
and waved in the general direction of the changing room. "You'll 
find a couple unmarked sets of supplies in there; just take one. 
We always keep a few around for the odd visitor."

"Okay," I said and stepped inside.  "Heaven knows I'm certainly 
odd."   The thudding from my boots changed timbre noticeably, and 
echoed.  *I really shouldn't wear them in here, either,* I 
thought.

Keiichi held out a hand.  "Oh," he said rather tentatively.  "One 
thing."

I glanced back at him over my shoulder.  "Yes?"

He screwed up his face as if at a distasteful memory.  "I think 
Skuld's out in the yard, but... just in case..."

I raised an eyebrow.  "Just in case?"

He nodded.   "If the water in the tub starts swirling or 
bubbling, get out *fast*."  He grimaced again.  "It's less 
painful that way."

Slowly I turned.  "Say *what*?"

                              * * *

After her brother and the stranger had vanished down the hallway, 
Megumi swallowed nervously and turned to the ... being ... seated 
next to her.  "Buh..." she began, then stopped, licked her lips 
and swallowed.  "Belldandy-sama..."

Warm brown eyes, crinkled at the corners with a smile, turned on 
her.  "We'll have none of that now, Megumi."

Megumi dropped forward in the lowest bow she could make -- or she 
would have, if Belldandy had not stopped her with a finger on the 
point of the girl's chin.  "But..."

"Nothing has changed, Megumi," Belldandy said softly, her 
everpresent smile driving the growing panic from the girl's 
heart.  "We are still the same people we were this morning, and 
the day before, and the day before that.  Urd is still Urd, Skuld 
is still Skuld, Chris is still Chris, and I am still..."  She 
blushed prettily.  "I am still your brother's girlfriend.  All 
that is different is that you now know a little more about us."

"Really?" Megumi whispered as she let Belldandy guide her back 
into a sitting position.

"Really," Belldandy reassured her.

Megumi shook her head.  "You seem so... well, not *normal*, none 
of you are normal, but so... 'human'."

Belldandy's eyebrows crept up.  "What would you expect?"

The girl shrugged.  "I don't know.  A Viking goddess?  Three 
meters tall in fur and leather, with a huge double-bitted axe? 
Wild hair streaming in the wind as you scream war cries?"  She 
grinned sheepishly.

"We don't do that kind of thing any more," the goddess sniffed 
primly.  "In fact, we hardly ever did that kind of thing at all, 
and even *then* it was more Skuld than Urd or I who dressed like 
that."

Megumi's eyes grew wide.  "You're kidding!  *Skuld*?"

"Well, she *is* the leader of the Valkyries," Belldandy said 
matter-of-factly.

"At *thirteen*?"

"She's on sabbatical until she grows up again."

"*Again*?" Megumi blurted, then waved her hands.  "No, no, I 
don't think I want to know.  At least not right now.  I think I'm 
suffering from information overload."  She closed her eyes, shook 
her head, then opened them again.  "One thing I still don't 
understand."

"Only one?" Bell asked with an amused little smile.

Megumi frowned at her with mock annoyance.  "Well, one out of 
many.  How did my big brother, the nerd-king of Nekomi, end up 
living with three, count'em, three *Viking* goddesses and their
big brother?"

"Well," Belldandy replied, "that *is* a bit of a story.  Why 
don't we go into the kitchen and I'll tell you over some tea 
while I get dinner ready."  She stood, and held out her hand to 
the girl.  Megumi took it and got to her own feet.

"Sure," she said.  Tea would be perfect.  It was good to find 
*something* normal to latch onto.

                              * * *

Chris sighed breathily as his two erstwhile girlfriends ran up to 
him.  He noted with a bit of irritation that neither was 
particularly winded after doing a run that would have killed him. 
"Hi, girls," he said weakly.

"*HI?!*" Rachel demanded.  "You disappear in the middle of our 
date to go save the brat and all you can say is 'hi'?"  He 
blinked as both Chris and Ami gave her a perplexed look.  "What?"

Shaking her head, Ami muttered "Whatever," and looked Chris over. 
He watched with chagrin as her critical eye noticed his more 
disheveled state and the slight bruise forming on his temple. 
"Did you win?"

"Well..."

"Oh, don't be silly," snapped Rachel.  "Of course he won, didn't 
you?"

"Actually..."

"Oh, really?  It's not like they kill each other, you know.  He 
could have lost."

"Umm..."

"If Chris had *lost* would he be here now?"

"THAT'S IT!  I'm not dealing with this now!" Chris roared.  He 
stormed into the house, grumbling to himself.

"See what you did?" the women both snarled at each other, and 
rushed to follow the god.

As she walked toward the house, Ami stopped to check out the 
strange, futuristic motorcycle that was parked by one of the 
outbuildings.  She always found the NIT Motor Club's efforts 
interesting from a professional standpoint, and this one was 
particularly bizarre.  With a chuckle, she looked over the bike, 
noting that Keiichi was lucky he had a goddess on his side.  This 
one looked to be deadly.

Ami's good humor left her when she noticed its license plate. 
*New Jersey?  1986?  That plate's ten years old, but it looks 
brand new.  That doesn't make sense...*  Frowning over the 
anomaly, she broke into a trot so she could catch back up with 
Rachel and Chris, hardly registering the appearance of a grinning 
Skuld, a small toolbox in hand.

                              * * *

The bath made all the difference in the world.  I'd already felt 
vaguely grimy after my transit between universes.  (Probably 
psychosomatic, but even if it were, it was still an unpleasant 
sensation.)  Adding the sweat and dirt from the fight on top of 
that just made it worse.  So when given the opportunity to scrub, 
I leapt at the chance.  I followed that with a positively 
sybaritic soak in the furo, which did wonders for my various 
aches and pains.  I still needed a good healing, but that would 
wait until I retrieved my helmet.  Should probably alert the 
Celestials before I did it, too -- they probably wouldn't take 
kindly to unexpected magic worked in their vicinity.

"<Gods,>" I muttered to myself as I sank into the steaming water.  
"<Why does it always have to be gods?>"

I lost track of time in the bath, but the water was still warm 
when I decided I'd soaked enough.  After I dried off and stepped 
back into the changing room, I found that the clothes I'd been 
wearing -- boots, leathers, polykev, socks, underwear and all --
were gone.  That would have panicked me had it not been for the 
fact that someone had retrieved a complete set of my civvies from 
one of the panniers of my bike and had laid them out neatly.  I 
supposed someone was trying to figure out how to clean my 
leathers; I wondered if they'd notice that everything else was 
wash-and-wear.

Anyway, I got dressed in the provided clothes (jeans, crew socks, 
and my Hong Kong Cavaliers 1985 "War of the Worlds" tour T-shirt) 
and poked my head back out into the hall.  Empty.  No guard, not 
even one of the mortals trying to look innocuous.  The sound of 
conversation and clinking dishes drifted down from one end of the 
corridor, accompanied by the most marvelous scent -- dinner, 
unless I missed my guess.  My stomach growled, and I realized 
that it had been at least eight hours and maybe more since Pinky 
and Reno had treated me to my "condemned man's last meal" (as 
Pinky'd put it) at the White Manna in Hackensack.

I considered the possibility that this might be the lure for some 
fiendishly subtle trap, then decided I was being ridiculous. With 
four Celestials in the house, I was either a guest or dead meat, 
and they didn't have to play games to make me the latter.  *Some* 
gods would, for the sadistic fun of it, but from what I could 
remember about this particular expression of the Three, the Norns 
weren't that type.  Then again, these weren't exactly the Norns I 
was familiar with.  And, I reminded myself with a certain amount 
of trepidation, I knew absolutely *nothing* about "Big Brother".

Then I chided myself for being excessively paranoid, and stepped 
into the hallway -- where I stopped short.  From the threshold of 
the changing room, I could easily see the source of the enticing 
odors -- a very typical Japanese family/dining room at the end of 
the hall.  Through its doorway I could spy the low dining table, 
along with some of the occupants, who hadn't yet noticed me.

The first person I spotted was Captain Turquoise (now in civvies, 
too), who looked distinctly uncomfortable in seiza on the far 
side of the table from the door (and, thus, me).  He was flanked 
by two new folks, a pair of young women who appeared to be in 
their twenties and who occupied almost all of his attention. 
*Hm.  More mortal auxiliaries.  They must have shown up while I 
was in the bath,* I mused.  I raised an eyebrow when I realized 
one was a cop of some variety, in full uniform.  The other looked 
more like Buffy Coed.  

Surprisingly, the big guy looked like he would rather have been 
*anywhere* but in between two nubile young Asian girls intent on 
fussing over him.  Of course, the fact that each was glaring 
daggers at the other might have had something to do with it. 

"Are you sure you're alright?" the college girl asked.

"Look, I'm fine," he insisted.

The cop poked him in the ribs, and was obviously nonplussed at 
the wince she got.  "Uh-huh.  And those ribs aren't bruised, and 
that bump on your head is makeup."

"I'm *fine*," he repeated.  "Big tough Aesir, remember?  Taking 
this stuff's in my job description."

The girls exchanged a flat look, and Police Girl quietly stabbed 
a bruise on his temple with her finger.  He yelped and recoiled.

"You've been talking to that idiot Thor again," the coed growled. 
"Why do you listen to those dunderheaded gods?"  From somewhere 
out of my line of sight I heard a shocked gasp, followed by a
reassuring murmur.

Holding a protective hand to his head, "Big Brother" objected, 
"Hey, they're the pros, last I checked."  He waved off their 
protests and added, "I'll be okay in a day or two.  Part of the 
package is fast healing.  Look, trust me."

Miss Coed gave him a flat look.  "Fine," she said evenly.  "You 
owe me a movie, since we missed the one today."

"Mercenary, aren't you?" the cop muttered wryly, almost too 
softly for me to hear from my distant vantage point.  She looked 
over at someone hidden from me, and called, "Belldandy, can I 
borrow the phone?" 

I heard a faint noise that I assume was some manner of assent, 
because she stood gracefully, explaining to the big guy and the 
college girl, "I need to report in."

"She's gonna be in trouble," "Big Brother" sang softly as the cop
stepped out of view.  Then he turned his attention back to the
girl with him.  "Okay, Rachel, a movie.  We'll figure it out
later.  I've got something big to deal with here."  So the coed
was named "Rachel".  Okay.

Rachel opened her mouth to protest, but then shut it with a click 
in the face of his sincerity.  "Fine," she said shortly, and 
stood on her tiptoes and hissed him on the cheek.  "Let me know 
how it goes, God-boy."  She smiled at the wince that elicited.

I chuckled when I heard that.  It must be a popular nickname for 
him.  "I *hate* it when they call me that," he muttered, and I 
grinned.  Yeah, it was a popular nickname, all right.  

I must have missed something at that point, because God-boy had 
turned back in the direction the police girl had vanished, a 
concerned expression on his face.  "Everything all right?" he 
asked.

I heard a faint goodbye, and the second girl came back into view. 
Bewildered, she said, "Chris, the license plate on that 
motorcycle... it doesn't exist.  Did it belong to whoever you 
fought?"  Okay, two things to remember.  God-boy is named Chris, 
and Police Girl is *really* on the ball.

"Yes..." Chris said slowly, and then clamped his hand over her 
mouth and brought his face close to hers.  "Oh no, you don't," he 
said urgently.  "This is god business, Ami.  *I mean it.*"  He 
pulled his hand away.  "You understand?"  Okay, Police Girl is
Ami.  I was busy making mental notes, just in case.

"Okay," she grudgingly agreed, and then with a impish grin, 
grabbed his head and kissed him firmly.  "Gotcha," she gloated, 
releasing him.

"GAH!" Chris blurted, stumbling back.  "Can't you kiss like 
normal people?!"

"Where's the fun in that?"  Checking her watch, Ami winced. 
"Eek, I'm in trouble.  Bye!"  With that, she ran out of the room 
and down the hall.  She didn't even give me a look as she passed 
by.

"Women," Chris muttered in mock (or maybe not-so-mock, it was 
hard to tell) exasperation, and then looked amused. 
"'Dunderheaded gods?'"

Rachel was still sitting at the table, aiming a murderous glare 
at Chris.  "Well, they *are,* most of them.  Can you say 'Modi'?"

Chris actually growled.  "Don't remind me."  

*Well.  There's obviously a hell of a story there,* I thought. 
*Pity I'm not going to stick around to hear it.*  Another thought 
struck me.  *Interesting.  They're talking as though he's not a 
god himself.  Weird.*

"Anyway," Rachel went on, rising to her feet, "It's pretty clear 
the evening's shot."

"But..." he tried to object.

She shook her head.  "Nope.  You're not going to leave your 
sisters alone in the temple while Blondie is still around." 
*"Blondie?"* I thought.  *Well, I've been called worse.*  Rachel 
went on.  "And while I really like hanging out with them, it's 
not what I had in mind for my night tonight."  She shrugged, a 
little sadly I thought. "And I do have some studying I need to 
do..."  

"If you really think you have to..." Chris replied weakly.

"Yeah.  But, hey, it's not like we're never going out again." 
She stepped over to the big guy and gave him a very slow and 
gentle kiss goodnight, probably in a deliberate counterpoint to 
Ami's rather vigorous farewell just a minute earlier.  "See you 
tomorrow?"

"Sure," Chris breathed.  She hugged him with one arm, then turned 
and left the room herself.  Not being in quite as much of a 
hurry, she noticed me standing in the furo doorway.  She shot me 
the same murderous glance she had graced God-boy with, and then 
passed by with a sniff.  I simply smiled and bowed, after-you-my-
dear-Alphonse'ing her towards the exit the other girl had used.

When I stood up straight again, Verdandi was laying a heaping 
platter on the table and at the same time looking straight at me. 
"Sangnoir-san," she sang out, making Chris jump with surprise. 
"I see you've finished your bath.  Please come on in."  Between 
the mouth-watering scent of the food and the invitation I figured 
I didn't have a choice, and headed on into the dining room as 
Chris awkwardly seated himself back behind the far end of the 
table.

As it so happened, Chris and Verdandi were not the only persons 
in the room.  Seated to my left as I entered were Megumi, who 
still looked a little shell-shocked, and Urd.  On the right were 
Keiichi (who was just putting away what looked like a textbook of 
some variety) and an unoccupied cushion.  A quiescent but gently 
steaming rice cooker sat on the floor adjacent to the latter.

Skuld was missing, but there were two additional, unused 
cushion/seats at the side of the table nearest me, catty-corner 
from the empty one next to Keiichi.

Somehow, in the moments when my attention had been on Rachel in 
the hall, the table had gone from virtually empty to loaded.  On 
it were now one of those pump Thermos carafe things and what 
looked to be the single most ornate Japanese dinner I'd ever seen 
outside of a state function.  *This* was "a little something"? 
Yeesh.

Verdandi seated herself on the cushion by Keiichi.  "We've kept 
dinner waiting for you and Skuld."  She patted the empty cushion 
closest to her, around the corner of the table.  "Please sit down 
and join us."

"Um," I managed, and glanced around the table.  Both mortals 
still looked nervous, although for his part, Keiichi did seem a 
bit more relaxed than Megumi.  Urd caught my glance, smiled 
slyly, and gave me a "come-hither" look that would have made Mae 
West hang up her feathered hat for good.  I resisted the urge to 
answer her with a snarl.  Wedged behind the table at his end, 
"Oniichan" just loomed and glowered at me, especially after he 
caught sight of Urd's performance.

I rolled my eyes and sighed, then dug out my rusty diplomatic 
skills again.  "Lady Verdandi, please.  My presence clearly 
disturbs the harmony of the house.  There is no need to honor me 
with a place at the table.  If it please you, I would rather take 
my motorcycle and leave."

"Nonsense, Sangnoir-san.  You will join us for dinner."  I swear, 
that pleasant smile never left her lips *or* her eyes, but there 
was steel in her voice.  I knew that steel, too -- my mother and 
grandmother both had it, that "eat your peas or *else,* young 
man" tone that brooked no argument.  I sighed again.  Oh, well, 
time to look into the abyss and all that.  

"Thank you," I said to Verdandi and took the seat I'd been 
directed to, dropping smoothly into the kneeling/seated posture 
that obviously gave the big guy some problems.  He glowered some
more.  I smiled sweetly at him.

Completely ignoring the wordless byplay between him and me, 
Verdandi continued blithely on.  "Oh, and you haven't been 
introduced properly to Oniichan.  Sangnoir-san, this is our elder 
brother, Christopher Angel, the God of Moments."  She gave a 
sprightly gesture towards him.

*Uh, right.*  I didn't need a degree in Applied Theology to 
notice the obvious and totally unlikely collision of two 
completely incompatible religious traditions inherent in his full 
name.  Shoving the disturbing questions it raised to one side, I 
grinned weakly.  "Um, hi.  Douglas Q. Sangnoir, Colonel, UNMPFWA, 
UK, M.O.U.S.E..."  No one laughed.  Oh, well.  "Sorry about the, 
um, the kick in the, um, you know..."

"Consider it forgotten," Angel grated in a slow, forced tone that 
sounded like stone scraping on stone.  

*Uh, yeah, buddy.  It'd be more convincing if you didn't sound 
like you're about to leap across the table and throttle me.*  I 
suppressed a third, heartfelt, sigh.  With luck, I'd be on my 
motorcycle and gone within the hour, leaving this nest of gods 
and goofballs behind me for good.

While I was counting the minutes until my liberation, I heard the
sound of a door down the hallway behind me.  Unless this was 
someone else new, it had to be Skuld. 

"Hiiiii!" a familiar, high-pitched voice echoed up the hallway to 
us.  I was right, it was the kid.  Stockinged footsteps padded 
their way up the hall as I kept myself from turning around to 
watch her approach.  "Ooh, dinner."

"We've just been waiting for you, Skuld," Verdandi said with an
indulgent smile.  "Come sit down."

"Okay, let me get washed up first."  Skuld stepped into my field 
of view and held up a pair of greasy hands for inspection.  "I 
was just working in my shop."  She gave the table a smile almost 
as brilliant as her sister's, then scampered out, practically 
skipping.  A happy little hum trailed after her.

I raised my eyebrows.  That was a big difference from the dour, 
angry little girl I'd initially encountered.  "Well, *she's* 
certainly cheerful now," I murmured to the table at large.  "What 
changed?"

Nobody offered me an answer.

Skuld's mood noticeably darkened when she returned to the dining 
room and realized that the only available place was next to Mama 
Sangnoir's favorite son.  She flounced down onto the cushion with 
a dismissive sniff and turned up her nose at me.  The disdain on 
her face soon slipped away, though, and a smug little self-
satisfied smile began to play around her lips.

Now that we were all seated, dinner could be served.  As Verdandi 
began filling and distributing rice bowls, I surreptitiously 
studied the godling girl to my left.  Much as I disliked deities, 
I had to admit to myself I *had* been a bit out of line with her. 
I suppressed a sigh as I realized that I should offer her an 
apology, if only so that we could part on non-hostile terms when 
dinner was over.  Same thing applied to Angel -- the last thing I 
needed was a pair of deities with grudges at my back.

By this point, all the courses had been passed out, and dinner 
was about to formally begin.  The chorus of "Itadakimasu" around 
the table was a strange, surreal moment -- I'd expected it of the 
two Japanese, and I joined in because I knew I was supposed to, 
but to hear the three Norsewomen and Angel -- well, it was just 
odd for a second.

The oddness extended itself when I realized that dinner was 
indeed entirely Japanese food, with not even so much as a 
lingonberry or a lutefisk in sight.  This made me wonder who had 
prepared the feast in front of us.  Megumi was a guest, according 
to what I'd heard earlier; Keiichi looked like the kind of guy 
who'd happily live on cafeteria food, cup ramen, and take-out; 
and Angel did not strike me as the chefly type.  I seriously 
doubted that either of Angel's bookend girls had anything to do 
with it, especially since they'd been fawning over him the entire 
time I'd been watching them.  And Verdandi was smilingly 
parceling out the servings, which was almost always the job of 
the hostess/cook in a traditional Japanese household.    

I tried to wrap my mind around the idea that one of the Three 
could be playing Little Miss Homemaker -- *happily* -- and failed 
utterly.  I tried again and almost sprained something.  So I gave 
up and dug in with the others.

It was easily one of the best meals I'd ever eaten.

Dinner being dinner, and people being people, there was a babble 
of talk around and across the table.  Personally, I sat quietly, 
concentrating on keeping my meal from transmuting into something 
inedible as it entered my field one bite at a time.  That aside, 
I thoroughly enjoyed dinner, and tried to keep as low a profile 
as I could while I tuned into the different conversational 
threads.  

I quickly learned that Rachel and Ami were apparently in a to-
the-death competition for Angel.  As I chased down the last of my 
salad's ginger dressing Angel recounted the tale of the evening's 
interrupted date.  All through the story, Angel sat there with a 
classic hang-dog "Why me, Lord?" look on his face.  Well, if 
*that* were his karma I could certainly understand the peevish 
mood he'd been in when we met earlier.  No doubt he had the 
frequent urge to slap both girls silly and had decided to use 
*me* as a target instead, rather than ruin his chances with 
either.

Megumi, true to my earlier impression of her ignorance of matters 
here, was busily firing off The Big Questions about Life, The 
Universe, and Everything at all four of the Celestials.  Most of 
these were deflected with varying levels of grace.  Several 
others -- including a few I thought would have been on the 
"classified" list -- were answered, sometimes in excruciating 
detail.  Naturally, I took mental notes.  (In particular I 
promised myself that I would look up a place called "The Heart of 
Darkest Chocolate" if by some unlikely chance I ever found myself 
in Asgard.  I haven't had a decent malted milk since I moved to 
England.)

Keiichi interjected a few comments of his own into this exchange. 
From what he said -- and what he didn't -- I gathered that he had 
physically visited some variety of Heaven at least once.  Since 
he didn't have the look of a Jewish patriarch about him, I found 
this rather remarkable, and wondered again about his relationship 
with Verdandi.  Living mortals and the Celestial Realms normally 
mix about as well as mortals and the lands of the Fae -- which is 
to say, make sure your next of kin know where you're going, and 
that your life insurance premiums are paid up.

Being a good hostess, Verdandi tried to draw me in to the 
conversation several times.  Pleading fatigue, I declined to 
offer anything more than polite small talk, though, since I was 
unwilling to derail Megumi's interrogation and thus lose the 
chance to pick up more intelligence about the Celestials and 
their purpose here.

Of which I derived *nothing* that made any sense.  Angel was here 
because the Three were.  Urd and Skuld were here because Verdandi 
was.  And Verdandi was here, if I were to believe what she and 
Keiichi told Megumi, because Keiichi had *wished* for her.  Yeah, 
*wished*, like in a fairy tale.  If it weren't the goofiest 
disinformation program I'd ever encountered, it was a far goofier 
*truth* than I could imagine.  Or believe.

Dinner ended with Verdandi handing out dessert:  small servings 
of ice cream.  Well, small for everyone but Skuld, who got what 
looked to be two or three liters of rocky road in a bowl the size 
of a batting helmet.  I nibbled my way through my ice cream as I 
watched her emulate the Tasmanian Devil, and fought back the urge 
to shake my head.  My mind may have been saying "monstrous thing 
capable of snuffing entire galaxies on a whim," but my *eyes* 
were saying "cute if bratty little girl".

My eyes were winning, dammit.

For all that they were Celestials, the four seemed very human. 
Almost too human.  It had to be some kind of sadistic game.

Didn't it?

As impatient as I was, I waited calmly for the "official" 
conclusion of the meal.  I almost got comfortable, almost forgot 
what surrounded me, in the midst of a dinner conversation that 
eventually drifted off arcane topics and back into more mundane 
ones:  classes, clubs, a friend's attempt at her own small 
business.  Once I completed my dessert I faded in and out, nearly 
drowsing.  

I think I might have forgotten entirely that I was in enemy 
territory, had it not been for the clatter of silverware and 
crockery to my left that jerked me back to full awareness. Skuld 
had finished demolishing her confection, and almost as though she 
were personally offended at the empty bowl had thrown her spoon 
down into it.  Verdandi gave her a concerned look, and I got the 
impression that she might have said something had the others not 
taken it as a sign that dinner was over.

As everyone else stretched and moved away from the table, I 
stood, stepped back, and bowed toward Verdandi with a polite 
"Gochisousama."  When I straightened up, she was gracing me with 
a brilliant smile.  "Thank you for your hospitality," I went on, 
"but I must beg your leave to depart."

Verdandi's smile faded infinitesimally.  "If you must, Sangnoir-
san..."

"I'm afraid so," I replied, surprising myself by half-regretting 
that I was leaving.  "I just need my uniform and helmet back, 
please.  Then I'll take my motorcycle and go."

Behind me and to my left, I heard a faint "Uh-oh."  I wasn't the 
only one to hear it, since everyone in the room was now staring 
at Skuld.  Slowly I turned to look at her.

"What's *that* supposed to mean?" I asked with a calm that belied 
the sudden premonition of doom which gripped me.

                              * * *

Skuld had tried to weasel out of it, but Verdandi would have none 
of that.  Firm without being harsh, or even loud, she had simply 
asked that Skuld tell us.  Instead of speaking, though, the 
little goddess had silently led us to an outbuilding -- her 
workshop, according to Keiichi.  Flashlight in hand, she drooped 
her way across the night-shadowed and junk-strewn yard like a man 
on his way to his execution.  At the door to her shop, Skuld took 
the handle firmly in her grasp, then paused and murmured a quiet 
apology.

Then she threw open the broad door and hit a switch just inside, 
revealing what would have been a remarkably sophisticated 
workshop for a human girl of her age.  (Hell, it would have been 
remarkably sophisticated for *me*.)  Bright light illuminated the 
shed interior, shining down from several industrial fluorescent 
fixtures overhead.  A workbench -- white Formica from the looks 
of it, and spotless -- ran the length of the back wall. About 
half its surface was taken up by an assortment of equipment that 
ranged from the expected (timing light, vise, drill press) to the 
strange and outright bizarre (oscilloscope, stereo microscope and 
something that looked like the bastard child of a rice cooker and 
a particle accelerator).  The other half was taken up by Urd, who
promptly perched herself upon it.

The bench was supported by two cabinets filled with drawers, and 
under it were a big trash can and what appeared to be a small 
refrigerator.  A tall, wheeled stool was shoved off to one side.

Every hand-held tool known to man and then some were neatly 
arrayed on hooks, rings and pegs along both side walls, sorted by 
both size and function.  Tall, locker-like cabinets painted 
brilliant white lined the wall in which the door opened.  The 
floor was unfinished wood, scuffed a bit but like the bench it 
was spotless.  The whole place had a clean, crisp smell with just 
the barest hints of oil and gasoline and ... ozone? in the air. 
And scattered across the floor and the workbench were enough 
parts to build an entire motorcycle.  

*My* motorcycle, in fact.

"My... bike."

At my first reaction, Skuld snatched up a ratchet driver and 
clutched it protectively in front of her like some kind of charm 
as she stood in the middle of what had once been an exquisitely 
hand-crafted vehicle.  Now the only pieces left that were bigger 
than a breadbox were the panniers and the frame.  And -- thank 
goodness -- Buckaroo's second-best sword, carefully laid to one 
side.  "I just meant to mess with it a bit, to get back at you," 
she said, a little defensively.  "Over-tighten the brake 
calipers, or maybe restrict the fuel line so you'd stall out. 
But then I got interested in some of the systems, and I guess I 
got a little carried away..."  She trailed off sheepishly.

"My bike!"  I was not yet ready to listen to explanations. 
Behind me, the peanut gallery streamed into the shedlike 
building, making it seem even smaller than it actually was.

"I feel for you, guy.  You should see what she did once to my 
computer," Angel muttered in obvious sympathetic tones.  In my 
anger, I hadn't noticed that he had stepped up to my side, 
putting us shoulder-to-shoulder.  Well, shoulder-to-chest, at 
least.  His presence towering over me contributed a *lot* to the 
sense of shrinking space.

"My... bike," I whispered, dropping to my knees amidst the 
scattered parts.  Months of work building it, all the way back in 
MegaTokyo.  Years of faithful use through gods knew how many 
timelines.  Weeks more redesigning and improving it with 
Rawhide's help and Buckaroo's occasional input back in the last 
world I'd visited.  

"I mean, I can get taking the parts out," Angel announced from 
over my shoulder.  I barely noticed.

My motorcycle lay in a thousand pieces scattered across the bare 
wood floor of the shed.  The only way it could have been 
disassembled so thoroughly in so short a time *must* have damaged 
at least some of its non-monomer parts -- parts that it might 
well be impossible to replace in this universe.  Impossible 
unless they had a GENOM nanofac or a Black Lectroid autoshop 
handy, but I doubted I'd find either in *this* world.

"Hey, I've even taken apart drives in my spare time," Angel
continued without really waiting for a response from me.

Skuld tried to dig a toe into the floor and studied her ratchet 
driver intently.  "You had that really interesting gravity drive 
on it!  And the ceramic turbine!  And the bits that looked almost 
organic!  And there were traces of magic all over it!" she 
protested. 

"I can almost get her unsoldering some of the chips off the 
board.  But how did she split PCB layers, anyway?  Or open up the 
CPU casing?"

"Chris, quiet," said Verdandi.  A blandly forgiving expression on 
her face, she stepped up to her younger sister and laid a hand on 
her shoulder.

"It's destroyed," I said softly.  I looked up at the... the... 
*thing* that looked like a little girl.  "Why?" I asked.  "I only 
shook you a little bit and made you apologize.  Did you really 
have to destroy my bike to get even?"  I picked up the closest 
piece -- the headlight -- and studied it.  "All the time and work 
and joy I put into it -- gone forever."  I looked back up at her. 
"Congratulations, girl.  The only way you could have hurt me more 
would be to let Godzilla here kill me."  I gestured with my head
towards Angel, who was still hovering over me.

"Hey!" protested that worthy.

"It's *not* destroyed," Skuld declared with a pout.  "I was 
*very* careful about taking it apart.  Nothing's broken at all." 
There was an almost imperceptible pause.  "I think," she added in 
a nearly inaudible voice before scowling at me once more.  "After 
all, it's no fun if you can't put it back together again."

I lifted my eyes from the headlight and looked at her flatly.
"It can be reassembled?"

Her scowl deepened.  "I just said that, didn't I?"

I carefully put down the headlight and stood, saying, "Then you 
and I have a little project, chibikko."

"Project?"  Skuld blinked, then returned to her furious scowl. 
"Hey!  Don't call me 'chibikko'!"

"Remember that one," Angel muttered to Urd.  "She hates 
'chibikko.'"

"Yeah, a project, *chibikko*."  I jabbed a finger at her.  "You 
are going to put my bike back together.  And *I* am going to 
watch you every minute it takes, to make sure you do it right --
no cutting corners, no leaving things out."

"No *way*!" she shouted at me.  "It's *your* bike, *you* put it
back together!"

"Listen to me, you little brat," I growled, losing some of my 
self-control and reaching for her.  I wanted to pick her up and 
shake some sense into her -- again! -- but before I could do more 
than raise my hands I felt a large, unfriendly grip clamp onto 
the back of my neck.  *Right.  Angel.  Oh, fuck.*  I went limp 
and prepared for pain.

"Chris, that's unnecessary," Verdandi said mildly.  After a 
couple of seconds, the pressure released and the hand lifted. 
Verdandi then repositioned herself precisely half-way between 
Skuld and me.  She smiled at the big man behind me, then laid one 
hand on the brat's shoulder and the other on my forearm.  "I 
believe you've more than adequately made your point, Sangnoir-
san," she said in a tone that all but oozed peace and serenity. 

There was no reproach in it at all, but suddenly I felt more than 
a little ashamed.  I was a guest, after all, and I had been 
treated well.  They needn't have brought me in and cared for me 
after my fight with Angel; they would have been justified in just 
dumping me at the curb with a note reading "Go away!" pinned to 
my chest.  But they hadn't done that; instead they tended me, and 
let me bathe, and fed me.  Even though Skuld had vandalized my 
bike, I had no call to start acting like a complete asshole to 
her and to my hosts.

I closed my eyes and took a long, deep breath before opening them 
again.  "You're quite right, Verdandi-sama.  I'm out of line. 
It's just..."  *It's just that I fear and hate all gods but one, 
and four of you are surrounding me, and one of you has just 
demolished one of the few possessions I can carry with me from 
world to world, and another of you clearly wants to kill me, and 
dammitall I just want to make it home and why can't I, dammit, 
why can't I?*  Instead of letting all of *that* spill out, I took 
another long, deep breath and fought back the sob that threatened 
to emerge in its stead.  

When I thought I could trust my own voice not to crack or 
tremble, I continued, "I apologize for my behavior, Verdandi-
sama."  I bowed respectfully to her, then stood up straight again 
and caught Skuld's eyes with mine.  "But I mean it -- I *need* my 
motorcycle intact."  

Off to the side, I caught the motion out of the corner of my eye 
as Verdandi nodded.  "I understand," she said simply.  "Skuld?"

"What?" the girl grunted petulantly.

"You will help Sangnoir-san reassemble his motorcycle." 
Verdandi's tone was quiet and reasonable -- and once again held 
that steel.

"But, onee-sama..." Skuld whined.

"No, Skuld," the elder goddess interrupted.  "You took it apart, 
it is only proper that you help repair it."

"Not just help," I added, a little bit of my anger coming back. 
"I want her to do the lion's share of the work."  I looked over 
at Verdandi.  "As penance."

If looks could maim, the one that Skuld shot me would have left 
me in a basket.  

"Skuld," Verdandi said levelly, "I think you should promise 
Sangnoir-san that you will do as he asks."

Something about that innocuous little suggestion seemed to shock 
Skuld completely out of her snit.  Her eyes went wide and she 
dropped the ratchet driver, which landed on the wooden floor with 
a dull thud.  Behind me, Angel went "Huh!"  From where she was 
perched on the counter, Urd made a sound that was something like, 
"oho!", a strange little hint of a smile playing on her lips.

"Belldandy?" Skuld whispered, disbelief evident in her tone.

"A promise, imouto-chan," Verdandi repeated.

I looked around.  Keiichi was just as wide-eyed as Skuld; Megumi 
was merely confused.  I returned my attention to Verdandi, who 
was patiently but determinedly waiting on her sister.  "Okay," I 
muttered, mostly to myself, "what am I missing here?"

"Bell," Angel rumbled from over my shoulder, "are you telling her 
to do what I think you're telling her?"  He sounded vaguely 
amused.

Verdandi ignored him.  "Skuld?"

I glanced at the girl, and only with difficulty kept my own eyes 
from widening and my mouth from falling open.  The little goddess 
was actually trembling.  It was obvious that this was not just a 
two-bit, forget-it-when-it's-convenient promise that Verdandi 
was talking about.  From the way Angel and Skuld were reacting, 
this was Something Else entirely.

Verdandi and Skuld exchanged gazes for a long, long moment, Skuld 
stunned and nervous-looking, Verdandi calm, almost placid.  It 
didn't look like a war of wills, but evidently it was, because 
suddenly Skuld tore her eyes away and her shoulders slumped. 
"All right, onee-sama," she whispered.

Then she straightened up, drawing back together a little of the 
rambunctious spirit she had possessed earlier, and settled her 
eyes on me -- eyes that suddenly were no longer those of a 
thirteen-year-old girl, but those of the Celestial I had come to 
call "The Child".  If I hadn't realized before then that this was 
something more than a simple agreement between us, I would have 
figured it out when I saw that.

"Once again you try to compel Us," she said in a voice that rang 
heavily with tones that did not come from her vocal cords, tones 
that made it seem as if two people were speaking, not one.  "Very 
well, Douglas Quincy Sangnoir.  What do you want My avatar to 
promise?"

Over my shoulder I heard Angel quietly whisper, "Okay, who the 
Fnord is that and what did she do with my little sister?"  

*He's a god and he doesn't know?* flickered through my mind 
before the matter at hand took back my full attention.

Mama didn't raise no fool.  (Well, not in the sense of being 
stupid; it was sometimes appropriate in terms of a job title. 
But anyway.)  Whatever I requested at this point would be 
*binding*, like a wish from a genie.  And just like a wish, it 
probably would be interpreted as literally as possible.  I 
nodded to her, and took a moment to organize my thoughts.

"I want her to do a significant share of the work," I said, 
addressing my comment to Verdandi, who seemed to have taken on 
the role of impartial arbitrator.  "Not all, but a goodly amount. 
What do you think would be fair?"

Verdandi gave this some consideration.  She looked at the merger 
of Skuld and Child, who nodded fractionally at some unspoken 
communication.  Then she tilted her head to one side slightly. 
"Would you agree to half?" she asked.

I nodded.  "That's fine with me."  Then I turned my attention 
back to Skuld/Child.  I fought the impulse to get all high-magic 
formal in my language, and instead phrased things as plainly as I 
could.  

"Okay.  This is what I want you to promise.  That you'll honestly 
and sincerely work with me to restore my motorcycle to nothing 
less than the operating condition it was in when you took it 
apart, and that you will contribute no less than fifty percent of 
the labor necessary to do so.  You also promise to abide by *my* 
decision as to what counts as its proper operating condition, and 
to follow my instructions as necessary to get it there.  You 
further promise that you won't indulge in sabotage or other petty 
revenge against me via the motorcycle, especially after all the 
repairs are completed."  

To the side, I was sure I heard Urd snort and mutter, "He knows 
her."

Skuld/Child was looking thoughtful as I got to the end of that. 
I knew I was leaving a bunch of holes in the promise, but I was 
only asking for what was fair and equitable, no more.  Besides, I 
could handle attacks on my person, but the bike was very much 
something that I didn't want to risk.  Just to sweeten the deal, 
though, and maybe earn some goodwill, I threw in a little quid-
pro-quo.  "Your promise, by the way, is contingent upon my own, 
made right now, not to jerk you around or make your job harder 
than it has to be."  I nodded at Verdandi.  "Your sister decides 
if I've broken my word on that.  If I have, then you're freed 
from your promise.  And finally I reserve the right to release 
you from your promise at my whim.  Agreed?"

This got me raised eyebrows, from both Skuld *and* Verdandi.  I 
suppressed a smile as I toted up one point for my side.  After 
coming off like an angry jerk all evening, it was past time to 
show that I could be reasonable, too.

"Very well," Skuld/Child grudgingly agreed.  Apparently the idea 
of any promise to me at all still rankled on her.  "As witnessed 
in this place and time by my divine sisters and brother, I so 
promise."

At moment she said the words the marks on her face flashed a 
brilliant blue-white light, and I... *felt* something, something 
like a giant lock latching, or a huge light switch flipping -- a 
vast, solid *click* that reverberated along the pathways of my 
mage senses.  It was the first time I had ever gotten a tactile 
sensation from my metagift without using a song -- a mage *touch* 
instead of the mage sight I was used to.

When I looked back at Skuld after that, she was herself again --
just herself.  

"How come my transformation just turns me into a killing machine, 
and hers turns her into *that*?" Angel muttered.

"Different thing.  *Later*, Chris," Urd murmured.

I suppressed a laugh.  The elder brother of the Norns sounded 
like a complete newbie at the god game, which both tickled my 
sense of humor and intrigued me no end.  How could he register as 
a god to my magesight and yet have no knowledge of the 
transcendent overself that was the very *definition* of a god? 
It was almost as though he thought that the minuscule timeshares
of the Three's attention that inhabited these avatars were *all*
that they were.  

Something really weird was happening here.  

Back to the matter at hand, though.  I looked around at all the 
pieces, and realized for the first time that, as haphazard as it 
looked at first glance, Skuld seemed to have laid them out in 
some organized manner.  It wasn't the way I would have done it, 
and frankly, I didn't quite grasp the basis on which she'd done 
some of it, but I *could* see patterns in the way the parts had 
been distributed.  Maybe things weren't as bad as I'd first 
thought.

Even so, it still wasn't going to be a quick job.  I glanced 
around the workshop, trying to guesstimate how long it would take 
to get the bike back together, tested and working.  I frowned; it 
was harder to figure than you might think -- the only time the 
bike had ever been in this state was when I had been building it, 
all those years ago, and the original assembly time had been 
dictated by the combination of my budget and the speed with which 
I could design and fab up custom parts in the Ganbare and IDEC 
nanofacs.

Verdandi evidently saw my frown and misinterpreted it, for she
laid her hand on my arm again.  "Sangnoir-san, is there a 
problem?"

I roused myself from the near-fugue I'd entered and shook my 
head.  "Oh, no, I'm just trying to figure out how long this will
take."

"Ah."  She tilted her head and looked at her younger sister. 
"Skuld, what would you say?"

The girl's face took on a look of thoughtful consideration that 
she held for some seconds as she surveyed the room in exactly the 
same way I had.  "Two weeks, maybe three," she finally replied. 
"Longer if we have to find or make new parts."  She very 
carefully did not look at me.

Sorry, kid, but I think that's a bit optimistic.  "This is a 
hand-built custom mod based on a 2015 Mitsubishi Nightblade frame 
from another universe entirely," I said as calmly and softly as I 
could manage.  "Most of the engine components are individual 
giant molecules that were built atom-by-single-atom in a 
nanofabrication tank.  It was finished with an electrically-
sensitive paint that probably won't be invented here until the 
early twenty-first century."  Behind me, I heard someone whistle. 
"It took me over half a year to build it."

"Okay," Skuld grudgingly admitted.  "Maybe a little more than 
three weeks."  I rolled my eyes.

Keiichi stepped up for the first time since we'd all entered the 
shed.  "Sangnoir-san, if you'll have me I'd be happy help out 
with the reassembly," he offered without hesitation, and then 
shot me a sheepish grin.  "Have to admit I'm really interested in 
learning what I can from your bike."

"Me, too," his sister added.  "No way I'm going to miss out on
this kind of opportunity."

"Sure," I said, returning Keiichi's grin and sharing it with 
Megumi.  "The more the merrier, as long as Skuld here still does 
half the work herself."  I decided it liked this guy, and I hoped 
for his sake that Verdandi really wasn't jerking him around for 
her own jollies.  His sister seemed like a good egg, too, under 
all the shock of the day's revelations.

I looked over at Angel.  "You going in, too?"

He grinned and shook his head.  "I'm not a gearhead like the rest 
of this gang -- I'm a computer geek."

I grinned back at him.  "You'll probably want to take a look at 
my autopilot, then."  I smirked.  "That is, unless you're not 
interested in checking out some early-21st century silicon."

He gave me a half-lidded stare.  "Slick.  We'll talk."

Hearing that, the middle Norn laughed and nodded once more.  "Very 
well.  How long with Keiichi and Megumi's help, Skuld?"

Yet another scowl flitted across Skuld's face before she returned 
to the thoughtful expression.  "It should make it quicker, I 
think, but I don't know how much.  It depends on a lot of 
variables."

"Either way, at least a few weeks.  Fair enough," I said.  "We'll 
start on it first thing in the morning?"

Skuld shook her head.  "Can't.  I've got classes."

I raised an eyebrow.  "You go to school?"

"I go to *college*," she snapped at me.  "Nekomi Tech, like 
'Niichan and Keiichi and Megumi."

"Well, pardon me!" I said with only the faintest sarcasm.  "After 
lunch, then?"

Slowly, Skuld nodded.  "Yeah.  That'd work."

"Well, then," her sister continued. "Everything's settled."

"Everything except where I'm crashing tonight," I said.  Stepping 
around Skuld, I picked my way through the pieces of my motorcycle 
to reach the panniers.  For a moment, I considered the sword, but 
decided that it would have to wait; taking it in hand now, even 
by the saya, might still be seen as a threat, despite the new
armistice.

I turned back to the panniers, and popped open the one that would 
have normally been hanging on the rear of the bike.  From it I 
pulled out the prepacked overnight bag that I had stashed in 
there for just this purpose, and let the lid drop shut with a 
muffled thump.  With a rip of velcro I opened a side pocket on 
the bag and pulled out a clear plastic packet holding a pair of 
weathered gold coins, just to make sure it was still there.  

I turned back to my audience -- two mortals, four gods.  "Would 
any of you know where there's a jeweler or coin shop where I 
could sell these for some local curren